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Wife Who Beats Husband

Printed From: IslamiCity.com
Category: Culture & Community
Forum Name: Family Matter
Forum Discription: Discuss Family Issues
URL: http://www.IslamiCity.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=25119
Printed Date: 22 December 2014 at 12:40am


Topic: Wife Who Beats Husband
Posted By: irfiaffu123
Subject: Wife Who Beats Husband
Date Posted: 08 April 2013 at 1:09am

My wife beats/scold(harsh bad words) me whenever I get a phone call from my parents.

 

When I say, This is haram.

She reply:- Yes I know, any how I am going to hell only because I made sin by beating you.

So I will repeat the same because punishment remains same.

 

How to correct her, how can I make her to follow quran?



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Irfhan Basha
Riyadh, Saudi



Replies:
Posted By: shakirahmed12
Date Posted: 09 April 2013 at 5:47pm
First you should to start reading quran and offer her reading about quran. Take of hadis book about husband and wife Right, gift her. I think it will better for you.

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Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 10 April 2013 at 7:53am
Perhaps the frequency of these phone calls and bad timing in which you take the calls, is causing problems in your marriage, therefore you may want to correct your own behavior.  It certainly seems this would be an easier task than how to correct your wife.


Posted By: irfiaffu123
Date Posted: 10 April 2013 at 8:02am
Thanks abuayisha ,
 
The problem is , i wont atten or call my parents in bad timings.
 
I will call and speak with them only when my wife is in  happy mood.
 
But after i keep the phone, she again go for sad and aggressive mood.
 
Now she is in her mom's home and saying me, if i leave my parents only i will come back, otherwise she saying like she will  divorce me.
 
I love her to the core at the same time i would like to fullfill my islamic duties to my parents also..
 
I am dieing daily, i dont kw wt to do, pls help


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Irfhan Basha
Riyadh, Saudi


Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 11 April 2013 at 8:02am
What has your parents and her parents suggested to solve this issue?  How long have you been married?  Do you have children? I assume your parents are not in Saudi; does your wife accompany you when you visit them?


Posted By: irfiaffu123
Date Posted: 11 April 2013 at 4:12pm
She is the only daughter for their parents.
 
her father said:- "his daughter's wish is his wish"
 
her mother :- trying to convince her but afraid to send her alone...
 
so what i have done is, i have sent visa for her parents also . but her mom is thinking like what will happen when they return back to india frm saudi.
 
my parents :- i made them clear,that now i ammarried so we will maintan limits, dont behave like before, they are ok with tat.
 
we have married before 6 months only, no children...
yes in our last vacation she came with me to my parents house,
Problems happend at that time, their parents living in 45 mins drive frm our home in india..
 
yesterday also, i spoke with her tru phone, we had a chat for 2 hrs,
out of 2 hrs, shw was spoke abt my parents for 1 h 50 mins.like,  ur parents done tat,done this,people speaking abt ur mom and dad like this, tat etc,i am not worried for that but where is love here?
 
only question what she asked about me was, had food ?...
but still i love her so much, she is living in my thoughts in each and every second.
 
i tot like i can talk with their parents to convice her, but no use,
she wont listen her parents also ...  what to do?


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Irfhan Basha
Riyadh, Saudi


Posted By: irfiaffu123
Date Posted: 11 April 2013 at 4:19pm
i have started reading quran, she is in india now.
 
so i have send those hadis tro mail...
 
her reply is :-
 
Dont irritate me, by taking abou islam.
i am dennying the rights, so marry some one.
 
When i said start reading quran,
 
she :- i know you dont say that, you started reading now only
but i have done with that in my chilehood itself.
 
what can i reply?
if i reply anything, i know well, she will raise her voice and will start using bad words.... so i will be silent.


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Irfhan Basha
Riyadh, Saudi


Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 12 April 2013 at 10:19am
Why does your wife's mother fear sending her alone? 


Posted By: irfiaffu123
Date Posted: 12 April 2013 at 11:12pm
Because my wife hates my parents to the core.
 
She use to think about them and use to fight(beating) with me daily.
 
Eg:- she use to come closer to my face as good and tell your face is looking like your mom/dad . can you please do plastic surgery for me? 
 
when i say. now its going too much.!
tats it she will start like, your mom did tat,your dad did tat,
 
if i reply anything:- she will start speaking bad words and say why are you supporting them, they are bad.!if i say dont use bad words, she will start beating.
 
If i dont reply and sit calmly:- she will say, why are you not at all speaking anything, do you love them this much?, i hate you.
 
After sometime when she become cool down, i will ask, dear wife(with her short sweet name), We have very good life here, im earning vgood, will be happly , pls cooperate with me dear.
 
Her reply, i was good only but i know your mom have done black magic to seperate us one Astrologer told us.tats why i am like this now.
 
when i denny/say we sld not belive, again she will start a fight from scratch like you support your mom? you like her this much ?...
 
But at day end, finally she is spoiling her health, her mom knows everything abt her, so she is fearing to send her because she mght do repeat the same thing now also.
 
Now pls advise me,
 
 


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Irfhan Basha
Riyadh, Saudi


Posted By: Nausheen
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 9:19pm
Assalamualaikum,

It seems your wife suffers from some kind of personality disorder.
You should consult a psychiatrist. Not sure how good and easily available these services are in Saudi - definitely you can talk to one online or on phone in the US if you want.

Good luck!


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Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.



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