Family not accepting
Printed From: IslamiCity.org
Category: Culture & Community
Forum Name: Family Matter
Forum Discription: Discuss Family Issues
Printed Date: 24 August 2016 at 9:11am
Topic: Family not accepting
Posted By: Ashleyy
Subject: Family not accepting
Date Posted: 28 March 2013 at 7:26pm
I have been dating my boyfriend who is Muslim for 2 1/2 years. It has been a secret and since we started dating I have been converting to be a Muslim. We are panning on moving in with each other but he is facing many internal problems and I need help. He is afraid to tell his parents because he says they will not accept it and he will be disowned by his mother. He is scared of getting shunned and losing her prayers and being punished from paradise. Is there any way he can be saved even if he is disowned?Is there any way to convince his parents of acceptance?
Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 29 March 2013 at 9:33am
Your "boyfriend" has been enjoying you at the expense of his family, religion and culture. It is little wonder it has been kept secret. Don't waste your time with him.
Posted By: Al Jin
Date Posted: 30 August 2013 at 12:53am
If your boyfriend was a true muslim, he would not even consider having you just "move in" with him. He would honor you they way we are instructed in the Quran, and not disrespect you as one might disrespect a common prostitute. Until either of you is willing to live as man and wife, legally married, then neither of you can consider yourselves to be true, faithful muslims in the eyes of Allah. Live your faiths. No wonder his parents are upset. They do not want their son to leave the shade of the Quran for a woman who's willing to simply shack up with him. That is not what Muslim women, do!
If you walk to Allah, he will run to you.
Posted By: herber345
Date Posted: 04 December 2013 at 11:51pm
You both are of same religion and he should ask to his parent and be honest and show to your parent that you both love each other and want to marry.
You should also talk to your mother and convince your parent to ask his parent about marry. I know it is not easy, but if you didn't try you can't do any thing.
Posted By: honeto
Date Posted: 07 January 2014 at 3:33pm
Ashleyy, there seems to be a complicated situation here. And like we say in Islam, everything starts with self. So, first confirm and be firm that you are a Muslim. It means following the Islamic code of conduct in every aspect of life. Ask yourself if you know what this code of conduct is? If you do not know go to your local mosque and ask the imam, and 2-to follow it, even if it means some difficulty or some apparent loss.
After you have gain control of things for you, then encourage him to do the same and then anyone else who might be involved, like his mother.
The way you described things seem to give the sense that all three parties involved here (you, him, his mother) in some way are not following sincerely what Islam teaches. So like I said, start with yourself first, and may Allah help you and help us all, Ameen.
39:64 Proclaim: Is it some one other than God that you order me to worship, O you ignorant ones?"