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***** Marriage Dilemma.... Need Advice Pl

Printed From: IslamiCity.com
Category: Culture & Community
Forum Name: Family Matter
Forum Discription: Discuss Family Issues
URL: http://www.IslamiCity.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=23854
Printed Date: 18 May 2013 at 6:47pm


Topic: ***** Marriage Dilemma.... Need Advice Pl
Posted By: AlBawasel
Subject: ***** Marriage Dilemma.... Need Advice Pl
Date Posted: 12 September 2012 at 1:23am
Assalamu Alaikum

I have a dilemma that i would like to get some insight on.

I have been married for the 2 and half years now.  I am in the U.S and chose to do an Islamic marriage not a Civil marriage, so it only involved

me, my wife, the Imam, and witnesses of course.  It was done in the Mosque according to the Sharea'a.

The imam asked me to stop a week later to pick up the unofficial marriage certificate ( it was NOT a government official certificate and it did

NOT need to be filed with the city nor the government, just an unofficial certificate for our records) ... I went the week after and the

certificate wasn't ready yet. I was told to go the following week, but then i had to leave the country for a few months, and when i returned the

Imam had gone back to his native country for good.

I didn't mind because at some point down the road we were going to file an official certificate with the city, but we have not yet.

Problem is this, unfortunately, things are not working out and we are looking to get divorced ( we have been trying for a year now to make things

work, but it's not happening).

Today i went to the Mosque to ask if there's anything to do as far as the unofficial certificate, and they said they don't have it and they can't

contact the Imam that performed the marriage.

My question is, how do i go about doing the divorce at this point ?

jazakom allah kol el khair.


Replies:
Posted By: Nausheen
Date Posted: 14 September 2012 at 1:15am
Bismillah,
 
Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah.
 
Sounds like a tricky situation. Hope and pray you can get all help you need and proper direction.
 
Im sure you know best your situation and think divorce is the only way for you. If not, may Allah help you and you find peace/happiness in your current spouse.
If I may, how long have you been having problems, how long and what have you tried to make it work - if you don't mind. Divorce is a very big step, one should take only if one knows for sure there is not possibility whatsoever of any reconciliation.
 
Regarding your present situation - Is it not possible to ask the witnessess to go with you to the present imaam so he writes a certificate for you. In reality islamic marriages do not need to be documented on paper, as long as the sharia is followed - if at all any couple needs a document, later, I dont think they have to get signatures from the same imaam who married them in the first place.
Im not sure, but think this should be the case.
 
Hope someone else joins me in more insight on this matter.
 
wish you all the best.


-------------
Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.

Posted By: Purple Cup
Date Posted: 09 October 2012 at 3:16pm
Since it is not a civil marriage meaning legal marriage. I wouldn't think needing a certificate which isn't legal in USA. It is as if you were to the American law as you live together not married. In Islam all you have to do is pronounce divorce three times and it's done.

It would be advisable to get the divorce certificate from the masjed and keep in a safe place, so you can be protected should you be an immigrant and if you go back to your country she cannot enact spousal support and child support against you and then you unknowingly fly to your country to see you owe your country a hefty sum of money. (Please see my post about child support.)

Divorce is a tough situation for women and I hope that even if you feel divorce is necessary that YOU will support your ex and children with the best of means Insha Allah! This is your duty.

If you would like further advise from an Imam, I can recommend you to speak with an Imam on our website who is an Imam in Sacramento California USA. Please feel free to contact me at admin at habibimatrimonials.com




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What Muslim Matrimonials has 7 Sunni Imams on board?

Posted By: nothing
Date Posted: 11 October 2012 at 2:29pm
Originally posted by Purple Cup

In Islam all you have to do is pronounce divorce three times and it's done.

Only once sister, it's enough.

Salaam


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