Print Page | Close Window

Please help. My brother in law has died

Printed From:
Category: Culture & Community
Forum Name: Family Matter
Forum Discription: Discuss Family Issues
Printed Date: 24 May 2018 at 2:43pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 8.04 -

Topic: Please help. My brother in law has died
Posted By: lady
Subject: Please help. My brother in law has died
Date Posted: 23 February 2012 at 2:53pm
Assalaamoalaikum.   My father went to the hospital nine months ago and died that day unexpectedly. Three weeks before that happened my uncle went to the hospital and died several days later unexpectedely. Threr weeks ago my husband good friend was murder while driving his car on the road and no one expected or seen it coming. My brother in law went to the hospital last night and died unexpectedely. They live six hours away from me. So when i checked msges, i was driving my car. I almost hit a lady walking in the street and i did not see her at all until she scream. I am a calm person but now my whole body is shaking. I am now nervous that i or someone in my family will die. And i can not stop feeling anxious and scared. I come from a good family and we are known for being kind and sincere. And i am scared anf worried about my fam being stressed and i dont want them to see me vurnerable even though i know this is normal. And i womder if Allah is cursing us.
Also too i am a registered nurse and i travel to different states every three months. The hospital that i am working is the num 1 hospital in the states. I work a cardiac acute care unit where alot of the patients have had open heart sugery. And what is ironic is that there has been two death and one near death on my floor. And the permanent staffs said that they have not had that to happened in years. I asked one of the ladies why is this so? And she said because this hospital is yhr best and oir doctors do such a great job of being proactive in our patients trestment. Then one lady said to me in a joke that i am working ehen this is happening. But i smiled because i did not think that it was ironic because i saw death alot when i was working on more critical care floors. I also will like to say that these patients are not assigned to me at all. But now i am wondering what this mean with my fam and how at this hospital on the floor i work they have not seen death in years. Friends and strangers tell me that i have innocent and honest eyes. And alot of people like me. And i try to encourage myself to be a better muslim. Please give me your honest opinion. I asked Allah what does this mean but i am not aware of His answer yet.

Posted By: samirfaithful
Date Posted: 24 February 2012 at 2:32am
essalam aleykoum Sister,
firstly when a person cross as such situation in this life he should have grand faith in his crator who is allah.
secondely, adhama allah ajrakoum sister ina lilleh wa ina ileyhi rajeoun, and say allahouma aejourni fi mocibati wa abdelni kheyren minha okSmile
finaly, maybe i can concidere that events as test from god to u in this life maybe u will have great moment in the futur who knows have a faith in god thats the destiny only we should believe on it god with u sister
essalam aleykoum

Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 24 February 2012 at 7:20am
Wa alaikum salaam,

Lady we are very sorry for your recent trials and tribulations, and we know as Muslims that Paradise is good and none will enter but good people.  This life is filled with trials to test our faith.  Please know that it is Allah who takes the soul of a person and whether that person dies "unexpectedly" or otherwise the departure of the soul is the same for Allah.  Our life span has been decreed.  You and/or your presence is not an omen for bad things to happen, and it is not becoming of a Muslim to believe such things.  May Allah, Most High, increase you in patience, knowledge, victory and success.  It is a part of Allah's kindness to test us in this life, thereby removing our sins prior to the hereafter.  Lastly, I thank Allah you didn't hit that woman, and it is entirely understandable that you'd be nervous and upset.

Posted By: lady
Date Posted: 13 March 2012 at 12:48am
AOA. Thanks for the advice.

Posted By: Chrysalis
Date Posted: 13 March 2012 at 5:09am
Salam Alaikum Lady.

I am very saddened to hear of all your recent losses! Especially that of your father. Even the thought of losing a parent or loved one makes me shiver! Unfortunately this is life, and we eventually lose our loved ones...

As Muslims, we can only find solace in the thought that eventually we too shall die, and Allah-Willing be rejoined with our loved ones in the hereafter. (Ameen)

I pray that Allah grants you patience and helps you through your losses. May He also reward you for your patience during the hard time. (Ameen).

Also, like Abuayisha said... don't try to find a 'reason' or 'meaning' behind the circumstances your loved ones passed away in. As Muslims we only belief in the Qadr (Will) of Allah, and believe that their time with us was up.  May Allah forgive their sins and grant them  the highest levels of Jannah. Set aside your fears and whispers of Satan.

Take Care.

"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."

Posted By: peacemaker
Date Posted: 13 March 2012 at 10:48am

Assalamu Alaikum,

Lady, these are tough situations, and I pray that Allah (SWT) make you strong to deal with. May Allah (SWT) bless you with great patience and piety. May He forgive those who left us. May he bless them with Jannatul Firdous. Ameen. May He (SWT) protect and guide us all. May we seek the best here and Hereafter.


Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?
Qur'an 55:13

Posted By: lady
Date Posted: 20 March 2012 at 4:03am
Asa. Thanks for all your advice.
Samir, i did recite those arabic words numerous times. Also i asked my girlfriend to translate the meaning for me. Thanks. I also talked to my fam and asked them to talk to Allah(swt) about their future and HIS guidance. We all are doing well and feel good. My sis is doing better and she is laughing again sometimes. I Talked to someone about my nephew who is young because he has not cried alot yet. Only a little Maybe twice. I was afraud that he was going to find trouble later because maybe he did not believe or fully understand thst his father died. Anyway she said that when your father dies then it is best when u ate young because u are too young too be affected tremendously. So she said that his behavior is normal and i should expect for him to not cry alot.
Thisade me feel so much better.

Yes i know now that i should not say that my family maybe curse and that maybe my presemce is causing people to die.
And that thesr deaths are unexpected.

Also please make dua for my imam, he is soon to die. His wife just found out that he has terminal stomach cancer.

Print Page | Close Window

Bulletin Board Software by Web Wiz Forums version 8.04 -
Copyright ©2001-2006 Web Wiz Guide -