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I Didnít Love My Life Until I Became a Muslim

Printed From: IslamiCity.com
Category: Religion - Islam
Forum Name: Stories - How I Became Muslim?
Forum Discription: Stories - How I Became Muslim?
URL: http://www.IslamiCity.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22401
Printed Date: 22 December 2014 at 3:37pm


Topic: I Didnít Love My Life Until I Became a Muslim
Posted By: peacemaker
Subject: I Didnít Love My Life Until I Became a Muslim
Date Posted: 02 January 2012 at 3:51am

http://www.onislam.net/english/reading-islam/my-journey-to-islam/contemporary-stories/455209-american-alicia-converts-to-islam.html - http://www.onislam.net/english/reading-islam/my-journey-to-islam/contemporary-stories/455209-american-alicia-converts-to-islam.html

I Didnít Love My Life Until I Became a Muslim

American Girl Finds the Meaning of her Life in Islam

 
5.00 out of 5)
By Reading Islam Staff
Sunday, 01 January 2012 08:01
http://www.onislam.net/english/oimedia/onislamen/images/mainimages/30-12-11_h-1.jpg">Sister%20Alicia
Sister Alicia

Read and watch this interview with sister Alicia about her Journey to Islam; the self-destructive lifestyle she used to lead and the devastating ordeals she experienced and the happiness, satisfaction, and spiritual fulfillment that she enjoys now after embracing Islam.

Interviewer:

Can you tell me whatís your name please?

Sister Alicia:

Alicia Brown.

Interviewer:

Where are you from?

Sister Alicia:

IĎm from Texas.

Interviewer:

MashaíAlah, so you are a Texan!

Sister Alicia:

Yes, a deep east Texan! 

Interviewer:

How long have you been a Muslim?

Sister Alicia:

I embraced Islam just yesterday. 

Interviewer:

Oh wow, thatís great.

And would you tell me how was your life before Islam?

Sister Alicia:

I hated myself and everything around me. It was just like I wanted to do anything I could do to hurt myself.

I didnít come from a very religious family. I mean they say they are religious but they are not really what you would call a religious family. They are Christian Baptists, but we were the type of family that donít go to church regularly.

My parents were divorced when I was 10. So we lived with my dad after that until I was 17. My father was very very abusive to me and my younger brother. He wasnít so much abusive to my little sister, but he was really abusive to me so much I think because I reminded him a lot of my mother.

When I was 16 actually I moved in with my grandparents. I led a pretty self-destructive lifestyle. I hated myself and everything around me. It was just like I wanted to do anything I could do to hurt myself. I just did this like it was fun, and as something I wanted to do. Iíve tried drugs, alcohol and sex and nothing ever really fulfilled me emotionally.  

I went back to live with my mother when I was 17, and I thought maybe it was like a different thing; a new beginning. But still I led the same pattern, and maybe it even got worse.

I met my daughterís father when I was in my senior high school. He was really funny and sweat, so I thought that was a good path for me. And we dated for a couple of years, and I ended up getting pregnant. At first, it wasnít as bad. I wasnít fulfilled and we didnít have the best of things but it wasnít bad. We had somebody for each other at least, and I was just satisfied with what I had. I didnít ask for too much. I didnít expect too much, as I was certainly better than what I had before.

After my daughter was born, thatís when my friend, her father, got really heavy into drugs. It was not just drugs like Marijuana but Iím talking about hard stuff like Cocaine. I canít say I didnít do it, I thought itís OK, Iíll do it too. After like three months, we came to the point where we lost everything. So I quit that and thought he had to quit too but he didnít.

Interviewer:

So you broke up with him?

Sister Alicia:

I left him a few times trying to give him a chance after a chance because I loved him and I cared for him, and when you love and care for someone you forgive him, and a lot of people make mistakes and they are forgiven. I thought maybe he could change. Maybe I could change. I did everything.

Interviewer:

Iím sorry to hear that. Now how did you start to learn about Islam?

Sister Alicia:

My daughter was actually diagnosed with Guillain-Barrť Syndrome. Itís a syndrome that starts at your feet, and moves up your body and makes sure muscles are really weak, where your immune system attacks your central nervous system, and it causes your muscles to get really weak and moves up to different parts of your body. It happens to kids or adults. It can happen to anybody. My daughter can move her arms, but some kids get damaged layers, but thank God she didnít get that bad. She is getting better. I met Hayat and some Muslims at the hospital, and started to ask them a lot of questions about religion and things like that.

I think a lot of people are misinformed about Islam. I think a lot of people think that itís like the Hindu religion because this is what I thought.

Interviewer:

What really made you get attracted to Islam? I mean you knew about Islam, but what really attracted you to Islam to decide that it will be your religion?

Sister Alicia:

First, I think a lot of people are misinformed about Islam. I think a lot of people think that itís like the Hindu religion because this is what I thought. I thought itís just something predominantly like the Middle East type of things. I didnít really know about Islam. When they started to tell me that a lot of Islam had to deal with the same background, because Iíve always known that thereís one God Iíve never questioned that, but I was brought up as Jesus died on a cross and that he was the son of God.

But it was then like the question was why did Jesus have to die on a cross for our sins, why can't God could forgive us anyway? I mean why does that have to happen? Because God is all powerful and He could do anything, why did He have to get somebody die on a cross for our sins. Then there was the fact that the bible has been translated so many times and there were so many different versions of the bible. I canít even count how many different churches Iíve been to. They were basically Christian churches but they all have something different and everybody can give you a different answer. I mean you can ask anybody, and they can say my bible says this or this but if itís a different bible, so which one is the right kind and that was always confusing for me.

But then when I looked at Islam, I found that thereís one Quran. Everybody knows what it says. Itís translated in the English but you can read the Arabic. Itís not something that you canít learn or you canít read yourself. Itís not very difficult to understand. Itís fairly easy to understand. Itís not like five different things that can come out of it. Itís pretty self-explained and thatís what attracted me.

Interviewer:

I want to know what really hit you and made you say ďThis is the right time to take Islam as my religionĒ. How did that happen with you?

Sister Alicia:

First, I knew in what direction I was heading, but I was really scared because when you grow up your whole life being told that itís blasphemous to say that Jesus is not the son of God; thatís blasphemy. And in the religion I grew up in, thatís the unforgivable sin. And if you commit that unforgivable sin then you will go to Hell.

What made me get over that fear and pass that to where I could allow myself to embrace Islam, was when I was talking to Hana, Hayatís mother, and she showed me a lot of passages and I had prayed every night before I go to bed: ďOh God please give me a sign, some kind of a clear sign to know thatís the way Iím supposed to go.Ē And she read a passage of Quran to me and I canít read Arabic, so I read the English part and the last words, I donít remember which chapter it was, but it was about Jesus saying Iím not God and never said I was, and then in the last sentence it said ďTo all who are looking for a sign, this is a sign within itselfĒ. This is a sign for you. If this is what you are looking for, this is your sign.

I actually embraced this because this is something special, because you donít get a sign from God everyday.

To me that was like an overwhelming feeling came over me and I just started to cry because I just felt like this is my sign. This is exactly what I was looking for, and God gave this to me. And I actually embraced this because this is something special, because you donít get a sign from God everyday. That made me really happy and then felt love and support because nobody before was so happy for me, and I never had that before.

Interviewer:

How do you feel right now after you embraced Islam?

Sister Alicia:

I feel really good. I feel like a big weight has been lifted off of me. I feel like I can breathe easier than ever before. I donít have to worry about anything anymore. Iím re-born and Iím free of everything. All the sins that I have committed and all the things that happened in my life donít matter any more.  

Interviewer: 

Alhamdulellah, now exactly all the sins you have done before are not only forgiven but actually they are swapped and they are all like mountains of good deeds right now and good blessings in-shaíAllah.



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Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?
Qur'an 55:13



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