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Losing Faith

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Category: Culture & Community
Forum Name: Groups Men (Brothers)
Forum Discription: Groups Men (Brothers)
Printed Date: 20 April 2018 at 5:02pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 8.04 -

Topic: Losing Faith
Posted By: Fearfull
Subject: Losing Faith
Date Posted: 05 August 2011 at 11:25am
I went through a bad divorce last year. It has taken a toll on me. I prayed very hard to keep the marriage intact. But when it failed after all my prayers, I started to lose hope. I also realized that in whole process my ex wife had found a new husband before our divorced was even fianlized. I felt betrayed and hurt and was looking to Allah for help. But I realized as days went by all the mistakes 1 does in this world have no punishment here and any 1 can get away doing anything without any care.
I also find people who are very tactful and cunning seem to have it made easy while the normal feaful people have no option. Now I have become one of the tactful people, I do everything haram but I say things halal, act halal but dont mean a word. I am not proud or happy of what I am. But it is what it is.
I know Allah is not my servant  but I am his. But faith has so much meaning when one prays for help and the person being cheated needs some help. At the end of the day I know I am wrong and will have to answer my actions. But my fear for the day has gone now.
All I have now is contempt. May Allah forgive me, but i dont think I deserve it if I am forgiven.

Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 05 August 2011 at 11:23pm

Faith and imaan increases and decreases throughout our lives, and you happen to now be at a point where it is low, however never despair of Allah's Mercy and forgiveness.  How many years were you married? children?  I ask Allah to bless you with something better in return for what you have lost.

Posted By: lady
Date Posted: 06 August 2011 at 10:59pm
Assalaamaoalaikum brother. Look, I feel like what you are feeling is normal. You have divorced and divorce is not easy. Your have experienced something that is traumatic for you. In life we will have our moments when we are feeling good and  then  there will be moments where we may feel low. You do need to pray to Allah (SWT) and ask HIM to change your hurt and your heart.  Allah does not gives us any burden that we can not handle.  The same things you tell us, tell to Allah (SWT). Tell HIM how you feel and that you want HIM to help you with this pain because you are living a life that is ultimately destructive for yourself.  Look you need to continue to read the quran, fast, and pray to Allah. Reading quran will reminds our of our responsibility as muslims. And it will help us to think about our religion which would keep us from spending our time daydreaming or feeling sorrowful for ourselves. Listen, if you do these good things for yourself trust me, life will get better. My father died maybe now 4  months ago. His death was unexpected.  My uncle died unexpectedly three weeks before my father's death.  No one seen this coming at all.  My uncle was christian, so the pain I had in my heart for him I kept to myself because I could not tell my muslim friends and family to pray for him. When people told me that in time, things will get better. I did not believe them at all.  I remember thinking how can you make that statement when I am suffering so much. I also remmeber too, when this was said to me, that I used to geniunely give this same advice to people myself. But they are right because I feel really good now, and I am almost back to my normal self.  what I am saying to you is that you may think that your life will not get better because of the pain that you are feeling now. but trust me it does. but you have to take the responsibility of helping yourself get better. People can give you advise all day long, but you also have to make the initiative to change your thinking. It is not easy to do things when we have pain and when we feel so depressed.  Look talk to Allah (SWT) and tell HIM that you want to feel good again, and you want to trust HIM and fear HIM. do this and trust me when you are honest with Allah and ask for HIS help for the betterment of your life then you will start feeling better. Look, you are going to feel pain and you are going to cry. But know when it is time to stop and when it is time to allow yourself that grievance again.  I feel bad that you are hurting during this time. I will try to keep you in my duas.

Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 12:05am
Inna LILLAHI wa Inna Ilaihi Raji'oon.....Allah have mercy upon him, and bless you for having patience.  Yeah, subhaan'Allah, indeed all of us are tested in this life.

Posted By: Ghazzali
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 12:54pm
Aassalamualaikum. Have patience brother. Do u know what patience is? It is when ur heart cries out for contempt, but ur brain says it will land u in trouble. Listen to ur brain. Control ur emotions. U can do it insha'allah. U know that contempt is bad, and u don't want to have it. That's why u wrote this post here. U want to do the smart thing. Satisfy Allah, and go to heaven. That's what is cunning. Have contempt and go to hell --- that's foolish. Just fight this period with ur own self. And remember, life is always bigger than love.

The world is a dangerous place to live in, not because of the bad people, but because of the good people who does not do anything about it.

Posted By: anonymous70
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 5:39pm
Well brother I know how you feel I mean its hard what your going through and I have gone through a divorce as well.People looking,taunting you,maybe even your family,and the one person you married betrayed you.Ive been through it all I still have those days and its been four years gonna be five thinking why me but Ive learned all is written when you were in your mothers womb.If that person you married already married then she wasnt written for you,I mean for her to get married or find someone before the divorce shes not written for you.You have to seriously read the quran,salah,go to the masjid listen to the sheik talk about islam.Whatever it takes brother you can do it,Allah subhana wa tala doesnt want to lead you astray you came on this islamic site to get advice  I know its hard and no one knows what to tell you or how you should feel.Tell your feelings to Allah and im sure of it you will get a great girl inshallah just be patient theres always ease after hardship.Think of it this way Allah subhana wa tala must truly love you for you to deal with this so you can get close to him.Ask allah for forgiveness Im sure your a great person and brother dont worry life it gets so hard sometimes but never lose the last bit of hope you have.I had people gossip,talk,make rumors about me I cried about it,but I woke up with feeling like oh gosh the people.Till I had another episode with a person who wasnt who I thought they were and went through it again but it got me closer to Allah.You also have to think maybe Allah has a plan for you more than what the normal person goes through.Maybe so you could become religous,marry a really religous good person,and to better yourself.Be glad you go through hardships through every trial is a disguise as a blessing from Allah,and sometime I forget it but I tell Allah forgive me and thank you for everything cause there are those who suffer in their daily lives and this is just for a time.Good luck brother,get closer to Allah and the deen and inshallah you will see what Allah has for you a great plan and destiny and you will marry a great person brother good luck and I hope I helped.

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