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Prophets – Muhammad
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Religion - Islam : Prophets – Muhammad
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ZamanH
 
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Quote ZamanH Replybullet Posted: 24 March 2005 at 8:27pm
Originally posted by Laurie

And, ZanmanH, how well I know you, though I have never even met you.

Atleast in my last post, I was not justifying intercourse with a 9 year old girl by any man.

My point was, it is incorrect to judge the character of the Prophet on the basis of his having intercourse with Aisha (R.A) when she was 9 years old (I have mentioned the reasons in my last post).

ZamanH

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Nausheen
 
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 24 March 2005 at 9:21pm
Originally posted by Laurie

Culture or no culture a CHILD of nine is neither physically or mentally advanced to commence adulthood let alone in the confines of a marriage.

Dear Laurie,

Who and what will define a child? remember there cannot be just one parameter.

The developmental time window of every species is different. Further it keeps changing, due to the effect of several environmental factors.

You cannot draw, with the pen of science,  a rigid, fixed line between a child, an adolescent and an adult for every generation and in every culture at the same point.

Take for an example,  the age at which a girl may start her period has come to depend a great deal on the diet. If this was 11-13yrs has now shifted to 7-10yrs. This is more common for those who are fed with a diet of animals grown on growth hormones. Is this not an event that prepares the body for hormonal changes? If so, the texts of science need to be re-written(at least for some), and the time window called 'puberty" needs to be re-described.

In the same way, science says that a woman who conceives her (first) baby after the age of 35, significantly increases her chances of deformity(mutation) in foetus. In the arab culture in olden times, women had conceived even at the ages of 65 - successfully.

If one does not study why this time frame keeps shifting, one may differ in parameters that describe who an adolescent is. But then we need to look at all the parameters that govern our mind, body and soul, not just one.

 If you look at the way children are maturing in mind these days, it is very different from former generations. Not just this, it has always been so that the human race has improved in intelligence in the new generations. These days children know a lot more than what their parents did at their ages. This definitely dictates them to react to the same circumstances differently.

"immaturity" in psyche depends on circumstances and responsibilites. for example, a seven year old may behave differently, from family to family and culture to culture, depending on if he or she is the single child, or has 4 siblings, the eldest child or the youngest, if is being broughtup in poverty and hunger, or affluence, with healthy education, whether or not has to earn for the family etc, etc....

My eldest aunt was married at the age of 13, and she had her first baby at the age of 14. She is the eldest daughter to my father's parents. Since much before her marriage she was taking care of the financial accounts of her grandfather. After her marriage she has taken care of all the daily chores in the household very efficiently, and we have never heard her complaining about "losing out on her childhood". She is not abnormal in anyway, trust me

In the west people are still in the prime of their lives at 35, where as in asian societies, if ur not settled between 30 and 35 ur getting late.

Going back to Aisha's (RAA) marriage with our beloved prophet (SAW), if you have read Umar's posts carefully, he wrote that Aisha(raa) was enggaged to some other person, but the enggagement was broken even before the Prophet (SAW) proposed her.

So from here one can conclude that his (SAW) proposal was not so much out of the norm for her (Aisha's) parents.

The effect of her marriage was in no way negetive on her personality and development. You can say that she was a special child, but in those days there were many such special children (if ur considering her age at marriage alone), she was not the only one in arabia.

 Our Prophet had 11 wives, and none other were as young as Aisha. - thus his (SAW) marriage to her was in terms of choosing a child bride, was not out of sheer tastes, and habit. In fact most of his wives were much older and all were widows, except Aisha (raa) and Maria (raa)

He is the best of creation and the best in character. Had he or her parents known that she was not ready in any way for the marriage, there was no reason for them not to wait a couple of years. Aisha's (raa) father Abu Bakr (RAA) was our prophet's best friend and companion since they were children. The love, trust, and faith between them and the honor with which they held each other was not ordinary. A promise or an extended engagement could not have hurt anyone, except that we do not know the wisdom behind timing for this marriage completely.

Therefore, the answer why they got married, when they did, is indeed that there was great wisdom in that marriage. We cannot understand all of it. We cannot even begin to fathom how much the community has benefited because Aisha (RAA) received a great deal of *training* under the kind care of our holy Prophet (SAW) since that age.

Not to mention she spent only 9 years of her entire life in marriage with him(SAW). ie she was a widow at the age of 18, but lived until 65. She was a scholar, a hadith narrator, a hafiz Quran (memorise the entire Quran), and a lot more. had her marriage been delayed, we dont know how it might have affected her character and development in terms of preservation of the religion. And we dont know if there would have been another candidate with the same family background, intelligence and persona to replace her.

Please note that every marriage of our Prophet (SAW) is an example in its own, and carries a wisdom in its own. there are several lessons to learn, and one cannot generalise or give a judgemental comment based on our perspectives of values.

He(SAW) has been recognised  as the most successful leader of human generation. He could not have erred in his choices of social behaviors. He was sent on a divine mission, and his choices were goverened by divine inspirations.

The error is not in his examples, rather in human perceptions, analyses and following of those examples.

Peace,

Nausheen

Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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Quote Laurie Replybullet Posted: 24 March 2005 at 9:49pm
A succinct and wise answer Nausheen and conveyed from the mind via the heart with peaceful feeling.  I was leaving this sight as I noticed your reply.  I will leave it at this moment as I do not have the time to tarry.  I will however read agin your reply and respond in a most positive manner when I get the chance.
So God wills it. So be it. It is done.
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ak_m_f
 
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Quote ak_m_f Replybullet Posted: 08 December 2005 at 10:53am
Originally posted by ZamanH

Originally posted by Laurie


And, ZanmanH, how well I know you, though I have never even met you.



Atleast in my last post, I was not justifying intercourse with a 9 year old girl by any man.


My point was, it is incorrect to judge the character of the Prophet on the basis of his having intercourse with Aisha (R.A) when she was 9 years old (I have mentioned the reasons in my last post).


ZamanH



he didnt had intercourse with her when she was 9
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sulooni
 
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Quote sulooni Replybullet Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:39pm
www.insight-info.com/forum/default
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Quote Chrysalis Replybullet Posted: 09 July 2008 at 12:23pm

Laurie:

There is a disagreement amongst historians and scholars as to the exact age of Aisha (R.A) when she consumnated her marriage with Prophet Muhammad. . . Some quote a later figure, others quote an earlier one. I will not argue as to her exact age, because to me that is irrelevant as long as she was past puberty. To me, what is relevant is whether or not Aisha was capable of/willing to consumnate her relationship with Prophet Muhammad.
 
 
There is perfect agreement that she had already reached puberty, and was sexually mature. That is Allah/God's (or nature's, whichever you prefer) way of saying that a person is capable of sexual intimacy and is physically mature.
 
In a society with no restrictions and complete freedom, after reaching sexual maturity, children naturally become sexually active, and need an outlet for these feelings. Islam recognizes that, and takes the moderate path i.e. you do not have to supress your feelings as wrong/dirty - but you also should not go around having unsecure/promiscous sex. Which is why marriage after puberty is reccommended.
 
Thus, Aisha - like any other normal young girl, got married - to the best of Men at that time, willingly. She was happy with him, and she loved him. (and he loved her)
 
Many people will hear of very young girls today who are sexually active, and think it is a normal, biological thing, yet when they hear of Aisha's marriage at a tender age, thier eyeball's pop out!
Alhamdulilah, Aisha was very happy with her marriage, and we read her accounts in her own words today, given the fact that she was a bold, independent lady - she always gave the most honest of accounts about her life with the Prophet. . . which relate how happy she was with him, and even mentions any slight tiffs she ever had. She was clearly not a victim in this marriage.
 
Having said that, the only issue (by some people) here that I can forsee is the age-difference. But that has never been considered a negative factor in a marriage - even today. Spouses with quite a significant age-difference have been happy together. Its not even a brow-raiser today. Also, apparently in those days as well, age was not an issue. Since many men/women married older spouses as well as younger ones. Prophet Muhammad himself was 20 years younger than his first wife, who was his sole wife until her death. And he loved her deeply. . . he was so saddened by her death that he termed that year his 'year of grief'. After which his relatives pleaded with him to marry again. And so he married Aisha & Sauda. Many of the companions of the Prophet also had older wive's. A quick example that just came to my mind is Abdur-Rahman bin Auf.
 
In a nutshell, even according to modern standards, its considered natural/ normal for post-puberty children to be sexually active. . . as young as 10. Then what is so wierd about a young muslim girl getting married and consumnating her relationship within a secure, loving marriage 1400 years ago?
 
 
 


Edited by Chrysalis - 09 July 2008 at 12:41pm
"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
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truthfinder
 
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Quote truthfinder Replybullet Posted: 17 July 2008 at 8:02am

AUTHENTICITY OF THE HADITHS

bEWARE OF FAKE ONES AND THEIR SLANDERERS AND MUDSLINGERS

 

 WAKE UP CALL TO Muslims

 

Dear Brothers in Islam,

 

When I was discussing with atheists, I made a search about the prophet’s marriage with Aisha and I am so happy that disbelievers or non-believers are very badly slandering and smearing about last Prophet. Please spread the following information to all forums and web sites.

 

 

A theology professor told me that the real map of Islam in our times are really more complicated to figure out than EVOLUTION TREE BECAUSE ORIENTALISTS' RESTLESS ATTEMPTS TO MAKE A MESS by producing FAKE HADITHS EVEN IN BUKHARI ,and he added, very soon there will be a study to pick all fake hadiths from all hadiths, sources and clean up all misconceptions, misperceptions, and misinterpretations In Islam to reveal the pure face of Islam and he added the same is needed for Christianity as well.The Truth about the prophet Mohammed’s marriage.

 

The prophet got married with Khadija in 595.

Khadija passed away in nearly 620.

Aise's sister, Asma was born in 595. She was ten years older than Aisha.

So Aisha was born in 605.

She got married in 623 with the prophet.

 

Indeed there is no need for our prophet to get married or get engaged while Khadjia was alive.

 

http://www.muslim.org/islam/aisha-age.htm

 

http://www.masjidtucson.org/submission/perspectives/more/family/marriage/muhammadmarriageaisha.html

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