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josh87
 
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Quote josh87 Replybullet Topic: aisha (r.a)
    Posted: 24 April 2005 at 4:40am

Salam,

I have read many questions in regard to how aisha was 9 yrs old when she married the prophet. Although i have known this most of my conscious life as a muslim, i have not questioned it, though it had cast me great doubt. After all, i am born in Mecca, and ask scholars many questions relating to religious and moral matters. However, the issue of Aisha intrigues me...

It is alright in Arab culture i understand to marry someone as soon as she starts her period in those days, as such is the occasion she may be seen/perceived as a woman.

Also, The prophet was a perfect human being and a representative of a true muslim on earth, i.e. sinless.

Now my question: There are customs and cultures in the world which are wrong on ethical or moral grounds. You gave an example of the african woman walking with naked breasts as such is normal though immoral under our religion, but such does not cause harm and is not ethically wrong if it does not cause or aggravate lust to such an immoral extent.

It was Spartan culture to leave weak babies to die, it is Hindu culture/religion to worship cows and have a caste system, and it was culture then to have slaves. All wrong as you will agree brother. Now, the prophet was perfect, so having sex with a 9 yr old, following custom, must also be perceived as no excuse.

Why? She is nine, not mentally or physically mature for such an action. Moreover, her soul cannot be entwined with someone else's who is 52 as she is not mentally mature. Right and wrong does not change, even in todays society marrying someone or having sex with someone who is mentally immature is wrong, and a sin.

The prophet didn't have to follow custom which is wrong under my line of argument. Moreover, King Solomon or David where not seen to be perfect human beings as Muhammad (pbuh) was, so them having 100 or 1000 wives does not correspond with the fact Muhammad only followed custom. The custom of having sex with a child is wrong, the culture wrong. I await your answer brothers and sisters

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Quote Suleyman Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 4:48am
Marriage of Ayesha (RA) with Prophet Muhammad (p.b.u.h.)
Question:

Assalamu alaikum

I am part of a study group & we meet weekly to read texts on the life of the prophet (s). Last night we read that the prophet (s) married Aisha (ra) at the age of 6 years and that the marriage was consummated when she was 9 years old. Could you please sketch the background/context to this event? Secondly, how should we deal with questions from non-Mulsims regarding this marriage & the apparent young age of Aisha when marriage contracted (at age 6)?

Best regards and Shukran jazilan.

Dr Faadiel Essop
Cape Heart Center, UCT Medical School, Cape Town, South Africa
September 08, 2000

 ANSWER:

Dear Dr Faddiel Essop! Wa alaikum assalam.

In the loving and brotherly manner that you approach this Website, compels me never to let any of your query go not adequately answered - and to the best of my knowledge. Yet, the issue you raised - or the like, which attempt to question the seerah, and behaviour of the Prophet of Islam (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) makes me sad, and I find it hard to discuss. Why, because, as a Muslim, I have accepted it first and foremost that Muhammad (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) was the prophet of Allah and never said or did anything without clear Divine sanction and permission - Ma yantiqo anil hawa'; in huwa illa' wahyun yooha' - al-Qur'an - that: he (the Prophet) never said (or did) anything of his own liking, but what was revealed to him. That being the position I never dare to question what the Prophet did and why. I wished you had avoided this marriage or age question related to the beloved wife of the Prophet (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) who, according to Ha'kim (Mustadarak) was shown to him in his dream by an angel saying: A'isha is your wife. This means the marriage was ordained by Allah Himself.

Having said the above, let me give you in sufficient detail how the marriage of Ai'sha (the Mother of the Faithful) was conducted. To begin with let me first caution how over the centuries, the narrow-minded malicious bigots made the Prophet's married life their most favoured target subject. They overlooked all the ground realities, the urgency and necessities and made the age or number of wives of the Prophet their central point of interest. We need to remember that when the adversary feels defeated on all fronts, the last resort is the area of character-assassination. That is what the hypocrites (Abdullah bin Ubai) and the Jewish clergy initiated right during the life time of the Prophet, and their friends continued it todate.

I feel sick, but let me quote a few so that you understand the seriousness of the subject:

(1) Philip Schaff states in the History of the Christian Church: Muhammad was a slave of sensual passion. The motive of his excess in polygamy were his sensuality which grew with his years, and his desire for male offspring.

(2) Gibbon writes in his Decline and Fall of Roman Empire: In his private conduct Mohammad indulged the appetites of a men and abused the claims of a Prophet.

(3) Gustav Weil writes in his History of the Islamic Peoples: Muhammad's harem occupies a conspicuous place in the Qur'an... It shows how easily the Prophet, in matters sensual, was carried away by his passions.

(4) Will Durant states in his Age of Faith: Women and power were his only indulgences.

(5) Nabia Abbot states in her work A'ishah the Beloved of Muhammad: Muhammed, the prayerful and perfumed prophet of Islam was avowedly a great lover of ladies.

For refutation of these wild allegations of sensuality leveled against the Holy Prophet we can do no better than quote the considered views of various other Western scholars who are not carried off their feet by prejudice and bias. We also quote the views of certain otherwise bigoted writers, who could not help but admit the high moral character of the Holy Prophet and the real motives which prompted him to marry more than one wife. We divide the life of the Holy Prophet into four periods as under:

(1) Life up to the age 25 years.
(2) From 25 years to 50 years.
(3) From 51 years to 54 years.
(4) From 55 years to 63 years.

We deal with the first part of the life up to the age of 25.

The Holy Prophet was born in a society which may be called a 'free society' where there was no bar to having extramarital relations. The Prophet was very handsome and well-built too. However, his youthful life up to the age of 25, when passions are very strong, presents a spectacle of very chaste and unblemished moral life. No critic Eastern or Western has been able to raise his little finger of scorn in this period of his life.

Observations of some Western scholars about the high moral character of the Prophet before his marriage to Khadija (R.A.) are worth nothing: Sir William Muir, a very hostile critic admits: "All authorities agree in ascribing to the youth of Mahomet a modesty of deportment and purity of manners rare among the people of Mecca".

P. de Lacy Johnstone writes in his work "Muhammad and His Power: "He enjoyed a high character among the citizens and nothing stands against his name".

Rev. Marcus Dods states in his work Mohammad, Buddha and Christ: His unmarried youth had been exceptionally pure".

Emile Dermengham records in his Life of Mahomet: "Mahomet's youth has been chaste".

Let us come to the second period of the Prophet's life from 25 years to 50 years.

At the age of 25 he married Khadija (R.A.) who was 40 years old. Before her marriage to the Prophet she had been married twice and had children born out of these unions. The Prophet remained wedded to her for full 25 years and all his children except Ibrahim (born to Maria, the Copt) were born to her. Their married life was a model of conjugal happiness, and deep affection.

The Prophet did not marry any other wife till Khadija lived.

Leon Nemoy writes in the Universal Jewish Encyclopaedia: Undoubtedly a marriage of convenience (Khadija on her part needed an energetic and experienced businessman to manage her mercantile interests) it developed, however, into a nearly ideal companionship of affection and mutual respect. Mohammed took no other wives during Khadija's lifetime and ever thought of her in terms of deep gratitude.

Rev Hughes records in his classic Dictionary of Islam: The house of Mohammad and Khadija was bright and happy one and their marriage fortunate and fruitful.

The Holy Prophet used to praise Khadija (R.A.) very much. A'isha (R.A.) said that she felt very jealous and said once to the Prophet. "Has not Allah given you a better wife than her?" The Prophet got very angry and said, "By Allah, He has not given me a better wife than her. She became a Muslim when others disbelieved in me. She testified to my truthfulness when others called me a liar. She gave me all her wealth when others made my life miserable. She bore me children when I did not have children from my other wives".

See just two remarks on the happy conjugal life of the Prophet with Khadija:

Emile Dermengham states that the Prophet "remained faithful to one wife much older than himself for a quarter of a century".

John Davenport records in his An Apology for Muhammad and Koran: Mohammed's gratitude to her (Khadija's) memory survived her to his latest hour.

We now come to the third period of the Holy Prophet's life from 51 to 54 years.

After the death of Khadija, Khawla bint Hakim suggested to the Prophet that he should marry. When the Prophet enquired as to with whom she proposed his marriage. She suggested Sauda bint Zam'a and A'isha bint Abi Bakr (R.A.). The Prophet agreed to the proposition. Sauda was married and Ayesha, being a minor was simply betrothed. Sauda was the widow of Sukran b. Amr, one of early followers who had emigrated to Abyssinia to escape persecution at the hands of Quraish.

Sauda was widow of mature age. She came in the Prophet's household three years before the Hijrah and remained with him for four years as his only wife.

About her marriage with the Prophet W. Montgomery Watt writes: In the case of Saudah, whom he married in Mecca, the chief aim may have been to provide for the widow of a faithful Muslim.

Sir William Muir states about this marriage: From the time of their marriage shortly after the death of Khadija she continued to be for three or four years the only wife of Mahomet.

So the Holy Prophet had only one wife up to the age of fifty four, and there was nothing sensual in contracting marriage with Sauda bint Zam'a (R.A.).

Lastly we study the Prophet's marriage with A'isha (R.A.)

A'isha was the only virgin wife of the Holy Prophet. At the time of her betrothal she was minor girl of about seven years of age. Some scholars do insist that she was older but most agree she was either 6 or 7 when betrothed, and she was delivered to the Prophet about one year after Hijra, during the month of Shawal.

Sir William Muir, while speaking about Prophet's marriage with Sauda, writes about the marriage with A'isha in these words: "About the same time he contracted a second marriage with Ayesha, the young daughter of Abu Bakr – a connection mainly designed to cement the attachment with his bosom-friend. The yet undeveloped charms of Ayesha could hardly have swayed the heart of Mahomet".

Washington Irving admits: Perhaps he (i.e. the Prophet) sought, by this alliance, to grapple Abu Bekr still more strongly to his side.

Rev. W. Montgomery Watt states: Since Muhammad had a political aim in nearly all his marriages, he must have seen in this one a means of strengthening the ties between himself and Abdu Bakr, his chief follower.

It is admitted by all scholars that A'isha occupies a prominent place amongst the most distinguished traditionists and hundreds of traditions are recorded as having been reported by her from the mouth of the Prophet. She was often consulted on theological and juridical subjects.

That shows why the Prophet under Divine inspiration was eager to accept A' isha into his harem at that age. No other person could have proved that useful for his Mission.

So in this marriage with A'isha there was a desire to cement the bonds of friendship with Abu Bakr as well as the desire for propagating the teachings of Islam, particularly delicate matters relating to women folk.

It appears that the Holy Prophet must have noticed early the precocious nature of A'isha. So in this marriage with A'isha nothing of the sensual was involved.

You might be knowing what is usually said about the marriage of Zainab bint Jahsh - the cousin of the Prophet (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) and widow of Zaid ibn Ha'ritha. The Qur'an first says: "Zawwajna kaha" i.e. "We (Allah) gave her in marriage (to Muhammad). Then the reason is noted: that Zainab was NOT the wife of Muhammad's son, as he had no sons. Zaid was only 'adopted". The Arab considered that a prohibited category. So the custom had to be changed by the Prophet himself, as no other one could effectively do that after him. Similar is the case of Umm al Momineen A'isha (R.A.). For a bad omen, Arab considered Shawwal a month prohibited for marriage. A'isha's betrothal and departure from her parent's house took place in Shawwal. This changed the ridiculous custom. Another bad custom was that the Arabs did not give the hands of their daughters to those who they "called" their brothers (though were not actual brothers). This was the objection raised by Abu Bakr himself, when the Prophet made the proposal. The Prophet (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) then told him that a brother in faith was not an actual blood brother to be placed in the prohibited category.

Lastly, my own personal opinion is that A'isha's marriage (consummation at the age of 9 to 11) indicates that if health condition and body vigour permit, there will be no "legal bar" (religiously speaking) on age, but it will certainly not be binding as well to go for young age marriages. Afterall, the Prophet (Sall Allah-o-alaihe wa sallam) never ordered or suggested that his followers should marry young maidens.

I hope this lengthy treatment of the subject matter will satisfy most who are eager to know the facts and reasons. The few filthy minds will not stop creating "Satanic Verses". We leave them to the harsh judgement of Allah - Maalik-i-Yaum ad-Deen.

 

M. Haq


Question:

Asalamu Alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

I am writing my question in regards to the matter of child marriage. I would like to ask your opinion on the validity and acceptability of the marriage of minors by their parents or guardians. Although it is not very common, their are still Muslim families who believe that it is a good thing for them to marry their daughters at a very young age, e.g. 9-14 so that they can secure a good match for them or get rid of the financial burden of raising them.

But i have heard of cases where the child is maltreated as well, but the Prophet's (saws) marriage to Aisha (ra) is always cited as the model example.

Also, although the option of puberty is given as a way out to the child, the initial trauma of marriage does not seem to be a consideration. Please tell me what is your opinion is about the acceptability of this type of marriage and what you would advise to parents or guardians who wish to marry their children off at young ages. Can it still be justified in today's world?

Ahlaam Khurshid
ahlaam@hotmail.com
United States

Answer:

Mr. Ahlaam Khurshid!

You have touched a sensitive question that has been elaborately taken up by the learned theologians and scholars since long. We will not add to that and let the people follow whatever view they consider carries more weight. What however, we feel to suggest (as our personal opinion) is that there is no specific order about the child marriage in Islam. It is not mandatory for the Ummah, and the issue left is open to the stages of social advancement and situations. If a society feels that in the current day sociological setting, marriage below a certain age is not required, it may go for that.

But let us make a note of warning too. The issue of child marriage has come via West and is part of a whole “package” that intends to dismantle Islam as a social code and state philosophy. Try to look at the components in that whole context. Let me give you a few tips: “child marriage”, “gender equality”, “women empowerment”, “sex education”, “reproductive control”, “contraception”, sustainable growth” – are among the few terms used in the gender context. Can you please tell me that you know enough about this “UN sponsored shari'ah”, that is being thrust as alternative to the Shariah of Islam? If you are not well aware, then kindly be careful about pushing too hard even some seemingly “reasonable” issues like child marriage. The real intention (seems) not to stop this practice today (which is more a Hindu issue), but lead to the erroneous conclusion that Islam permitted a “wrong” thing. Afterall this subject has been of special interest for them for the last thousand years or more. Why do you forget that the central theme of the filthy books like “Rangeela Rasool” and the “Satanic Verses” has been this so-called child-marriage.

 

M. Haq


Question:

Is it true that Aisha (P.B.U.H)age was 7 years at the time of her marriage with prophet(P.B.U.H).If it is true then what should be the age of girls to marry.

Sameer
India
al_moin@usa.net

Answer:

There are different reports and traditions regarding Ummu-ul-Mo'mineen Aisha's age when she was betrothed. What every one agrees to is that while the promise/nikah happened in Makkah, she was delivered to the house of the Prophet (s.a.w.) (meaning her 'Rukhsati') about four years later in Medina. Thus even according to the age you have quoted, she was about 11 years old when she entered the Prophet's haram in Madina. Some believe that she was above 13; some others reports say much older (17,19). The generally quoted age is 9 years.

In fact, Islam has imposed no restriction on the age of marriage, and certainly it has not ordered the young age marriages as well. What, of course, is obligatory is that a girl cannot be given in marriage without her consent, although the marriage has to be arranged by her 'wali'. An adolescent given in marriage has the right to break the contract at puberty.

 

M. Haq

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josh87
 
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Quote josh87 Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 5:12am
Neither of these statements acknowledge my questions under my line of argument. You give a couple of reasons as to why he should have married her, but to have sexual intercourse with her as being right, none at all. Plz answer my question directly.
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Suleyman
 
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Quote Suleyman Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 5:20am

Originally posted by josh87

Neither of these statements acknowledge my questions under my line of argument. You give a couple of reasons as to why he should have married her, but to have sexual intercourse with her as being right, none at all. Plz answer my question directly.

 Please read the message then you will have the answers;sometimes reading is not reading,reading is not seeing;it needs more to do...if i have missed one of your points then i believe that some of the members will fill the space...i see that there are good concepts passing in my copy giving answers to your statements,i believe.Wa Salam...

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Quote rami Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 5:47am
Bi ismillahir rahmanir raheem

>>>

Why? She is nine, not mentally or physically mature for such an action. Moreover, her soul cannot be entwined with someone else's who is 52 as she is not mentally mature. Right and wrong does not change, even in todays society marrying someone or having sex with someone who is mentally immature is wrong, and a sin.

The prophet didn't have to follow custom which is wrong under my line of argument. Moreover, King Solomon or David where not seen to be perfect human beings as Muhammad (pbuh) was, so them having 100 or 1000 wives does not correspond with the fact Muhammad only followed custom. The custom of having sex with a child is wrong, the culture wrong. I await your answer brothers and sisters<<<


Rasul allah (sallah llahu alaihi wa sallam) was commanded by allah to marry all of his wives except for Khadijah so to question the wisdom behind it is to question Allah, Allah decides what is or inst a sin not modern culture.

I seriously doubt you are a muslim as no muslim would make the mistake you did above espectialy one living in saudi arabia a place where christian teachings are few and reading the bible is more than simply frowned upon in wahabbi culture.

The only reason your post still remains is your careful wording of the question.



Edited by rami
Rasul Allah (sallah llahu alaihi wa sallam) said: "Whoever knows himself, knows his Lord" and whoever knows his Lord has been given His gnosis and nearness.
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Nausheen
 
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 9:33am

Auzubillahi minash shaitan ir rajeem,

Bismillah ir rahman ir rahim,

walaikum salam.

If you search this forum with the keyword "ayesha" or "aisha", you will find your answers and detailed reasons to those answers. A very long post "marriage to aisha" is in the forum "Prophet Muhammad"

A truthful seeker will find wisdom, in that which has been posted already. As has been stated above, questioning the conduct of the one who has been called the Best of Creation, and the wisdom of Allah is not islamic adab.

To attempt to understand the wisdom and to question these are two different matters altogether. Muslims busy themselves in improving their understanding.

Maa salaama.

 

Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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Quote josh87 Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 11:51am

seriously doubt im a muslim? rami, only God can judge me, not you.

And to be honest, i dont see myself as muslim anymore as i do not belive in the perfectness of the prophet Muhammad, due to this aspect, of aisha being 9 when she had sex.

I live in mecca btw, and dont have closed eyes. I study abroad, and so learn about other religions and educate myself. I dont belive Jesus was son of God, but rather am inclined to the quranic interpretation. U see, im caught ion the middle. Neither is Josh my real name, i'd ratyher not say in fear that i do live in Mecca, KSA, not the most liberal or best of countries. Though the brotherhood practiced in Mecca is beautiful, though they really ought to organise the Haram...its becoming more difficult to pray and touch the kaabah without wrestling through the crowd.

Now, to the question. Imagine you are nine, and the most powerful man approaches you...consent is not really a matter to deal with. Moreover, i hate this blind faith, why can we not question? I think therefore i am, and any doubts, if false, should be said, so you or others may help me. Not judge me.

I've searched and read all there is on this topic, but none answer my line of arguments.

Rami, i question Muhammad. He may have said he had this dream and was commanded by Allah, but do you not see the con? I believe wholeheartedly in the Oneness of God, but cannot bring myself to say the shahada because Muhammad did this act. This act cannot be permissable under a perfect God, if you acknowledge my first post.

Open your eyes...or help me open mine. Is it not only morally right to have someone married or have someone engage in sexual intercourse only if they are in the correct frame of mind to do so? Are you all telling me a 9 yr old knew what was happening, and she was, as was her soul, in a mature and capable state? If so, why?

I've spoken to many scholars and imams on this question, and most unfortunately turn violent or do not answer the question. The ones that did, stick to the fact that prophet did such as was commanded by God. This is a cyclical argument, as you have to accept the prophet for his word. Words do not constitute as a reason for such a serious action.

Plz answer in peace.

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Quote Yusuf. Replybullet Posted: 24 April 2005 at 12:13pm

Assalamu alaikum,

As Ukhti Nausheen has mentioned, this topic has recently been thoroughly discussed. The thread can be found at:

http://www.islamicity.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=77&K W=Yusuf%2E

Allah Hafiz

Yusuf
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