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Groups – Women (Sisters)
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Groups – Women (Sisters)
Message Icon Topic: How To Help Show The Way? Post Reply Post New Topic
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~~~D~~~
 
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Quote ~~~D~~~ Replybullet Topic: How To Help Show The Way?
    Posted: 22 August 2006 at 12:28pm

Slam 

        Sisters

    I have this 16 year old Muslim friend she from palisten but she always says she is Australian because she live there so she acts like if she were one of them. Just recently we convents her to pray and she does a every day but, every time I bring up the topic on covering she change the subject .

                         *How do I do show her the right way?

   I try to but she wouldn’t let me finish or even talk about it. If I stared talking about it she would say “Can we change the subject”

 

Sisters can any one sagest a way to get through to her??

                                                                                                I would be thankful,   

   

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herjihad
 
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Quote herjihad Replybullet Posted: 22 August 2006 at 6:47pm
Originally posted by ~~~D~~~

Slam 

        Sisters

    I have this 16 year old Muslim friend she from palisten but she always says she is Australian because she live there so she acts like if she were one of them. Just recently we convents her to pray and she does a every day but, every time I bring up the topic on covering she change the subject .

                         *How do I do show her the right way?

   I try to but she wouldn’t let me finish or even talk about it. If I stared talking about it she would say “Can we change the subject”

 

Sisters can any one sagest a way to get through to her??

                                                                                                I would be thankful,   

   

Bismillah,

I am concerned that now that you have "convinced" her to pray that she may decrease or stop if you push her too much on a subject she asks you to not to talk about.

Why don't you emphasize prayer, fasting and Quran for now?

Salaamu Alaykum

Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.
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Quote righteous_4ever Replybullet Posted: 22 August 2006 at 9:19pm

Salam Alaykum

I got inflenced by my friends to wear hijab. Do you wear hijab? If you, it'll put a good impression on her. Dont rush into things, let her understand. You could bring up some hadiths or ayats from the Quran, randomly in your conversation with her. I hope this help, Inshallah.

Salam

Hadia
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~~~D~~~
 
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Quote ~~~D~~~ Replybullet Posted: 23 August 2006 at 12:17am

Salaamu Alaykum

herjihad
       

    I didn't push her or try to make her ,Because I    know you can't fours some one to do some thing they don't want. She prays, fast and read the Quran the only thing she doesn't do is cover.

 

righteous_4ever


 

Do you wear hijab? If you, it'll put a good impression on her.

 

 Yes I do wear but the thing is we are not in school together and she goes to an American school so none of

them cover there and i'm the only one out of her friends that cover.

  Some times we talk about it and i feel she wants to cover but then she thinks of school and changes her mind .

 

~~~~~Thank You For Writting ~~~~~

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Quote righteous_4ever Replybullet Posted: 23 August 2006 at 8:59am
Ummm....One should feel comfortable when wearing a hijab and confidence in themselves. The best advice I can give to you is that give her time and pray for her. I go to an American school too, and my sister and I are the only Muslims there. I feel quite comfortable wearing the hijab, and feel confidence in myself. Not to mention, I feel unique. Will this help?
Hadia
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Quote ~~~D~~~ Replybullet Posted: 23 August 2006 at 10:04pm

Salaamu Alaykum

righteous_4ever

Your right I guess all I can do is give her time and pray for her and hope that one day she'll find her way…

~~~Thank you very much for writing back ~~~

 

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Quote righteous_4ever Replybullet Posted: 24 August 2006 at 8:54pm

SalamAlaikum

Tell me if it turns out right.

Hadia
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Quote righteous_4ever Replybullet Posted: 26 August 2006 at 10:08pm

i found this when I was surfing the net. Hope this helps. Asalam o Alaikum

Why She Won't Wear Hijab!
A Discussion by A.Q. Alidost

A convesation for Muslim sisters:

"I'm so tired."

"Tired of what?"

"Of all these people judging me."

"Who judged you?"

"Like that woman, every time I sit with her, she tells me to wear hijab."

"Oh, hijab and music! The mother of all topics!"

"Yeah! I listen to music without hijab…haha!"

"Maybe she was just giving you advice."

"I don't need her advice. I know my religion. Can`t she mind her own
business?"

"Maybe you misunderstood. She was just being nice."

"Keeping out of my business, that would be nice..."

"But it's her duty to encourage you do to good."

"Trust me. That was no encouragement. And what do you mean `good` ?"

"Well, wearing hijab, that would be a good thing to do."

"Says who?"

"It's in the Qur'an, isn't it?"

"Yes. She did quote me something."

"She said Surah Nur, and other places of the Qur'an."

"Yes, but it's not a big sin anyway. Helping people and praying is more
important."

"True. But big things start with small things."

"That's a good point, but what you wear is not important. What's important
is to have a good healthy heart."

"What you wear is not important?"

"That's what I said."

"Then why do you spend an hour every morning fixing up?"

"What do you mean?"

"You spend money on cosmetics, not to mention all the time you spend on
fixing your hair and low-carb dieting."

"So?"

"So, your appearance IS important."

"No. I said wearing hijab is not an important thing in religion."

"If it's not an important thing in religion, why is it mentioned in the Holy
Qur'an?"

"You know I can't follow all that's in Qur'an."

"You mean God tells you something to do, you disobey and then it's OK?"

"Yes. God is forgiving."

"God is forgiving to those who repent and do not repeat their mistakes."

"Says who?"

"Says the same book that tells you to cover."

"But I don't like hijab, it limits my freedom."

"But the lotions, lipsticks, mascara and other cosmetics set you free?!
What`s your definition of freedom anyway?"

"Freedom is in doing whatever you like to do."

"No. Freedom is in doing the right thing, not in doing whatever we wish to do."

"Look! I've seen so many people who don't wear hijab and are nice people, and so many who wear hijab and are bad people."

"So what? There are people who are nice to you but are alcoholic. Should we all be alcoholics? You made a stupid point."

"I don't want to be an extremist or a fanatic. I'm OK the way I am without hijab."

"Then you are a secular fanatic. An extremist in disobeying God."

"You don't get it, if I wear hijab, who would marry me?!"

"So all these people with hijab never get married?!"

"Okay! What if I get married and my husband doesn't like it? And wants me to remove it?"

"What if your husband wants you to go out with him on a bank robbery?!"

"That's irrelevant, bank robbery is a crime."

"Disobeying your Creator is not a crime?"

"But then who would hire me?"

"A company that respects people for who they are."

"Not after 9-11"

"Yes. After 9-11. Don't you know about Hanan who just got into med school?
And the other one, what was her name, the girl who always wore a white hijab…ummm…"

"Yasmeen?"

"Yes. Yasmeen. She just finished her MBA and is now interning for GE."

"Why do you reduce religion to a piece of cloth anyway?"

"Why do you reduce womanhood to high heals and lipstick colors?"

"You didn't answer my question."

"In fact, I did. Hijab is not just a piece of cloth. It is obeying God in a difficult environment. It is courage, faith in action, and true womanhood.
But your short sleeves, tight pants…"

"That's called `fashion`, you live in a cave or
something? First of all, hijab was founded by men who wanted to control
women."

"Really? I did not know men could control women by hijab."

"Yes. That's what it is."

"What about the women who fight their husbands to wear hijab? And women in France who are forced to remove their hijab by men? What do you say about that?"

"Well, that's different."

"What difference? The woman who asked you to wear hijab…she was a woman, right?"

"Right, but…"

"But fashions that are designed and promoted by male-dominated corporations, set you free? Men have no control on exposing women and using them as a commodity?! Give me a break!"

"Wait, let me finish, I was saying…"

"Saying what? You think that men control women by hijab?"

"Yes."

"Specifically how?"

"By telling women how and what to wear, dummy!"

"Doesn't TV, magazines and movies tell you what to wear, and how to be `attractive'?"

"Of course, it's fashion."

"Isn't that control? Pressuring you to wear what they want you to wear?"

[Silence]

"Not just controlling you, but also controlling the market."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you are told to look skinny and anorexic like that woman on the cover of the magazine, by men who design those magazines and sell those products."

"I don't get it. What does hijab have to do with products."

"It has everything to do with that. Don't you see? Hijab is a threat to consumerism, women who spend billions of dollars to look skinny and live by standards of fashion designed by men…and then here is Islam, saying trash all that nonsense and focus on your soul, not on your looks, and do not worry what men think of your looks."

"Like I don't have to buy hijab? Isn't hijab a product?"

"Yes, it is. It is a product that sets you free from male-dominated consumerism."

"Stop lecturing me! I WILL NOT WEAR HIJAB!
It is awkward, outdated, and totally not suitable for this society ... Moreover, I am only 20 and too young to wear hijab!"

"Fine. Say that to your Lord, when you face Him on Judgment Day."

"Fine."

"Fine."

[Silence]

"Shut up and I don't want to hear more about hijab niqab schmijab Punjab!"

[Silence]

She stared at the mirror, tired of arguing with herself all this time.

Successful enough, she managed to shut the voices in her head, with her own opinions triumphant in victory on the matter, and a final modern decision accepted by the society - but rejected by the Faith:

"Yes!" - to curls on the hair - "No!" - to hijab!

"And he (/she) is indeed a failure who corrupts it [the soul]!"
[Holy Quran 91:10]

Subhana'Allah!!!

Hadia
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