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Message Icon Topic: Does Islam allow Surrogate mothers? Post Reply Post New Topic
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amah
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Quote amah Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 2:10am
Above is the page from one of the three links i posted before. If I am not wrong sister herjihad recommended that site once....which i did find useful alhamdulillah.
Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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Angela
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Quote Angela Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 9:14am

Amah,

I noticed this forum when I was checking PMs.  I should point out in both fatwas, they discuss the mans sperm entering the surrogates womb.  I think I need to educate you on how surrogating works.

First, the mother is given injections of a potent hormone.  From this she hyperovulates producing many eggs.  Around a dozen are harvested and then frozen. (there is a surgery involved here) The husband then donates the sperm, which is also frozen. (this is a man, a cup and a private room, or a man, his wife, a cup and a private room, either way, the doctor doesn't see his privates)  Then in a lab, in a dish, the eggs and sperm are introduced together.  At that time, a blastocyst is formed.  A multicelled organism.  These are then encouraged to split to a certain size and that is then implanted in the surrogate.  The baby is already growing before it ever gets into the surrogate mother.  There is no sperm introduced into her body.  The baby is completely, 100% genetically the mother and father's baby.  When the child is born, the baby has no genes from the surrogate.  The baby was implanted in the womb, nestled into the side of her uterus and continued its growing that started in the test tube.  The same procedure is used in IVF for infertile women.

In this case, the surrogate woman would never  have the sperm of the man touch her, only the forming child.  In a way, like a nursemaid who feeds a child who is not her own, a surrogate mother is feeding a child who is not her own through the rich blood of her womb. 

Now, on that note.  My church forbids this for a spiritual reason, not for a biological reason in which the Sheik used.  The Mormon Church believes in Eternal families and child born of a woman is spiritually bound to her for eternity...therefore in our theology, the lineage would get confused.  But, that's an LDS view of the spiritually eternal families and since Islam doesn't teach that...it wouldn't apply in this argument.

 

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Quote amah Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:04am
Thank you so much Dear Angela for your post.

Lineage issues are extremely important in Islam, so much so that even having another man's sperm in your body is not allowed. Why the shaikhs mention only sperm? Here a sperm and fertilized egg is the same thing coz that Embryo is the result of another man's sperm (and ofcourse of another woman's egg), you get me? Allah knows best.

And since I am a mother, i personally feel it is not just a biological experience having  a baby in your womb, its an  emotional (you may call it spiritual) connection with the baby as well as with my husband.

Jazakallahukhairan.

Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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Angela
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Quote Angela Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:08am

Amah,

That's nice, not all women.  Myself included have that opportunity.  My husband would like a biological child, one I cannot give him.  So, where do we turn.  If we were muslim, then we could not adopt a child for our own, that is forbidden.  We could foster an orphan, but its not the same.  Again, its forbidden, but I can completely sympathize with a man and a woman wanting a child of their own. 

I wonder what the answer would be if it was a man's second wife in a polygnous marriage?  Just a curiousity.  Its illegal in the US, but in other countries????

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Quote amah Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:37am
Sister, Islam does not forbid raising and taking care of other children. The only thing not allowed is changing of names.

Also it is ok till the child is underage, once he or she attains puberty, they become nonmahram to the opposite sex, (either to the father or mother) so purdah has to be observed. So that's a little difficult..

It is highly recommended in Islam to take care of orphans.
Narrated Sahl bin Sa'd: The Prophet said, "I and the person who looks after an orphan and provides for him, will be in Paradise like this," putting his index and middle fingers together.  (Book #73, Hadith #34)

I don't know your problem but i can always keep on praying for you! I know how the desire for having your own children is! May Allah give patience to all of you (and us).

It is easier said than done, but sometimes there is wisdom of Allah in this.....AISHA , Prophet's(saw) wife had no children from him (ditto with other wives, except Khadijah).

I have been through phases of miscarriage and not being able to conceive and you know what ? I had this blind belief that Allah WILL GIVE ME children, or atleast a child. I prayed and prayed like a mad woman. I knew either He will grant me my wish here, or replace my dua with something better in Dunya or Aakhirah.

Alhamdulillah! sister i will pray for you, I have seen miracles.... and you were the one who reminded me of Prophet Zakariya's (as) dua!!

ps- so have you adopted??



Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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Quote amah Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:39am
Originally posted by Angela

I wonder what the answer would be if it was a man's second wife in a polygnous marriage?  Just a curiousity.  Its illegal in the US, but in other countries????



Very interesting point, never thought about it! Imagine Co-wives being generous!!
Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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Angela
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Quote Angela Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:45am

No, we were adopting and my husband changed his mind.  His new insurance covers infertility treatments.  So, now he can afford for me to undergo different treatments.  So we are seeing a RE (reproductive endocrinologist) on July 21st to determine the next course of action.  Which means I will be unbearable to deal with afterwards.  The medications and injections make me sick.

Side note, Amah, did you know there is a hadith that the Prophet told a woman to breast feed a young boy she was taking in to make him Mehram to her.  In modern times, even if you are unable to have children you can lactate with hormones given to you by a doctor.  Thus you and your husband can become Mehram.



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amah
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Quote amah Replybullet Posted: 04 May 2006 at 10:57am
I pray everything goes easy for you .........and you have loads of kids!!
Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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