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General Islamic Matter
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Mihs
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Quote Mihs Replybullet Topic: justice between man and woman?
    Posted: 18 July 2014 at 4:36am
Aoa. I want to ask a question that has been disturbing for a while now. I hope to get help from you soon. Islam allows men to have four wives and also keep the slave women. While the woman is to be loyal to her husband soleley. Is it fair towards a wife? She has to tolerate her husband being with many other women but has to be with him only? Justice? Then she has to please her husband whatever or however the husband may be. His displeasure could cause her to be in hell. But if he doesn`t fulfill all the wife`s rights, there`s simply no threat or punishment for men. They are just given a relaxed hand to treat their wives any way they want, and the wife has to be obedient no matter what. Even if she tolerated all this with patience solely for the reward of the hereafter, she again finds out that shell has to be with her husband in Jannah and not only him but his hoorein as well. Is it fair? Fine I know there will be no feelings of jealousy then but about now? Allah has given us feelings now in this world. How a woman will feel to know that she has to be loyal to a person who can have as many slave women to enjoy in this world and will have hoors in hereafter? A woman merely demands love and loyalty from a relatioship, why has Allah ignored her feelings just to fulfil a man`s wishes.? Does Islam favours men? And then a woman is made all dependent on man. She isn't allowed to have a second of freedom without husband`s permission. She like a caged bird in Islam. All the time spent in pleasing a husband who can be pleased by many women. And if she asks for divorce she`ll end up in hell. But a husband can throw her off whenever he wants and only the wife would be blamed for displeasing her husband. They are always dependent on men for finance can't even build up their self esteem by working without a husband`s permission. What are women given in this world and the hereafter? Is it fair? Please don't compare Islamic status with pure Islamic status of women. Islam considers the pleasures of men only. In all Quranic verses and sunnah, the word men is used. Please clarify in detail.
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Quote NABA Replybullet Posted: 26 July 2014 at 10:57pm
Assalamalecum,Allah in Quran had given equal rights to both men and women, in some cases Allah gave upper hand to women and in some cases to men, but overall result is equality.regarding question to have 4 wives.Allah in ch 4 v 3 of Quran says it is permissible for you to have wives upto 4 but u have to ensure justice among them, if not it is better to have one.look at this verse Allah is giving a facility but also responsibility,the reason Allah allowed concept of 4 wives is because if u observe female infants are stronger than male infants and mortality rate of male infants is higher as compared to females so therefore female population exceeds male population, in europe and usa female population exceeds by millions, so think if there is a situation in which all men are married then there will b some girls unmarried so the best way is to marry a married man and achieve a status in society rather than to live alone.Allah in ch 4 v 34 regards men as khaiyyam for women . Unfortunately many take wrong meaning of word khaiyyam,actually it means protector.Allah in ch 4 v 19 says it is unlawful for you to inherit woman under compulsion.now tell me this verse signifies the gr8 respect for woman.Allah says to take care about feelings of woman.how u can say Allah gave men the preference.in fact Allah dislikes the making of face gloomy on birth of girl child in ch 16 v 58-59 of Quran.unfortunately people are way away from Quran and they had developed their own rulings for eg not letting women study.our prophet Muhammad S.A.W (pbuh) said it is obligatory for every man n woman to gain knowledge.Allah in ch 96 v 1-5 is addressing to whole mankind-recite in the name of Allah who created from clay, recite inthe name of Allah who taught u that u ddidn't know, recite and Allah is the doer of gr8 things.i recommend you to read Quran with translation and don't hear or give importance to those who didn't have knowledge and create their own rulings.Allahfiz.

Edited by NABA - 26 July 2014 at 11:00pm
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Quote Mihs Replybullet Posted: 29 July 2014 at 1:44am
Thankyou.. nd well answered.. but you didn't answer all my questions.. u just gave an overview that girls are equally important in islam.. please try and answer one and all of my questions separately.. Thankyou for the effort you made.
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Quote NABA Replybullet Posted: 31 July 2014 at 2:41am
Assalamalecum,ur first question how would wife feel if husband is with other women??? Firstly if u really love Allah you have to obey and be satisfied with all commandments, as it is mentioned if a man can afford to have another wife he can provided that he had to ensure justice,so u can't complain about the freedom of having wives to a man, because its the verse of Allah.think practically that if a situation arises as I mentioned in my previous post, definitely 2 or 4 wives will depend on man for financial and other necessesities so now a role of being a Muslim comes that to acquire peace by submitting will to Allah, means to sacrifice ur willings n obey Allah.u say that we men will be provided with hoors in hereafter but to attain that reward we have to strive,means if a man is good towards his wife then only he will attain salvation.so if u claim to love Allah u have to obey commandments irrespective of ur willing.like eg we will score a sin ifwe men knowingly beat our wives but Allah made it lawful for us only when if a wife is found gguilty of adultery even after warning for 3 times then we r allowed to beat in such a way not to have a scar on her (ch 4 v 34), now u will ask what is the punishment for men for adultery, answer is given by Allah for whole in ch 24 v 2 is 100 lashes.i will answer seperately every question only after ur response to my each answer.
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Quote Mihs Replybullet Posted: 05 August 2014 at 12:35pm
Ofcourse, when one loves Allah, s/he will submit to Him. But why is this compromise of nafs/feelings asked from women only? Compromise on husband sharing, on independence, on wanting to travel around the world, on wanting to be the one whom parents are proud of, ... Why? Why not men have to compromise anything except their money? I wud rather give up my money than be a second hand human being, inferior to men, I wud rather strive and fight and give my life in the way of Allah than be caged at home, I wud rather live alone than with a shared husband, I wud rather work in sun and provide money for my family than relax at home, u see nothing is being asked of from men to compromise, they earn their own living, rather everyone's dependent on them.
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Quote NABA Replybullet Posted: 06 August 2014 at 9:22am
But who said u to stay at home???? Who said u to sacrifice ur needs?? Read Quran there is nothing in it to stop u from leading ur life but to lead ur life under shariah,in fact ch 4 v 19 had a broader meaning by this verse I can't even force u to do my paper work sacrifice is way away.its because some people who say that they claim to have knowledge of Quran say this,I tell u u shud focus on reading and implementing Quran and forget what people say, u say we men are not ordered to sacrifice,read ch 24 v 30-31 in which Allah ordered us modesty for men first and then women.if u observe there are several women who work and take care of houses MashaAllah,don't make impression of islam by listening to others, read Quran, if ur intention is clear nothing to worry about others, as a person I believe in full freedom of women because I fear Allah.in Quran there is noverse that prohibits women from independent living but u have to follow shariah.
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Quote Mihs Replybullet Posted: 07 August 2014 at 12:13am
I am not saying anything about sacrificing needs.. Its about sacrificing wishes.. That which u require not but want.. Men do not have to compromise any of their wishes... But women HAVE TO SACRIFICE THEIR WISHES AND WANTS AFTER MARRIAGE... now u see what I m saying.. Men can fulfill their wishes whenever and however they want but WOMEN can't without the permission of husbands except those few lucky ones who have got sensible husbands.. If u say that they could have it in their marriage contract then their wud be no rishtas/proposals for her.. And then all the blame wud cum on the woman and that now she wud remain unmarried for a long time... But Islam gives no punishment or fear to men who suppress women's rights, but it all the time suppresses and frightens women for not pleasing husband and this and that. Its all about frightening women. Now do u have anything to say in defense.. Doesn't it say so? U are only one of a few who believe in women freedom.

Edited by Mihs - 07 August 2014 at 12:13am
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Quote NABA Replybullet Posted: 08 August 2014 at 10:22am
Assalamalecum,who says we men can't be punished for supressing rightsof women??? Read ch 4 v 19 the ccompulsion.what do u mean by this? ?? It means that to force someone to go against his wish.so Allah forbids that and whatever we do the forbidden thing definitely we will be penalised unless we repent.u accept that few lucky ones who got sensible husbands, well look this is not problem of islam it is problem of community and yes I agree that most men even litterate ones does this but for their acts we can't say islam is wrong.no.Islam is the religion that if we follow nicely in Sha Allah everybody will be happy and satisfied.i ask u to read and understand Quran daily one page and then u will have a different vision about life.
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