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General Islamic Matter
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Religion - Islam : General Islamic Matter
Message Icon Topic: Marriage in the Modern World. Post Reply Post New Topic
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amina77
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Quote amina77 Replybullet Topic: Marriage in the Modern World.
    Posted: 28 June 2013 at 8:29am
So we've reached the inevitable age where marriage is spoken about, thought of, and even self contemplated. You mentally make notes of who might be a possible suitor, who to stay clear away from and who your parents like. Until suddenly, a 25 year old man comes into your life and blows you away. Handsome, educated, and most importantly, a Muslim. But who's to say being a Muslim generally means being a person who follows the religion, right?
So never the less, he's somewhat interested in you too. He's mainly infatuated by the way you differ from the normal women he associates with... at the night club. He commends your modesty, class, and the respect you have for yourself. He loves how family orientated you are, and just overall your common decency.
But he's tied up... He's caught in the stage between the "I'm too young to get married, I just want to club with my friends because I still feel like I'm young and time is flying", and the, "My parents are right... Getting married is the right thing to do religiously, and I don't want to miss out on my chance".
So while he's in this mental dilemma, he's still leading you on, talking about marriage and getting together, and knowing that you're actually falling hard for him. But really the main thing on his mind is fear. Fear of losing his youth... at 25.
A year passes on, no progress, you somehow lost contact on the way and you've both somehow moved on doing the same things you were doing a year ago.
You find yourself suddenly looking through his Facebook profile, and seeing the pictures of the rowdy night-club scene you see him at. But instead of sadness, you feel sad FOR him. Really? At 26? Is this what he really wants? But you tell yourself quietly... "If he comes back to me, I would actually take him back." Is that the good mentality to have? Is it your problem or his? You know you still have feelings for him... But what should you do about it religiously? Does the all mighty Allah have someone else planned? Should all faith be lost on this 26 year old? Moving on is hard, but with a little guidance, it can be done with a bit more ease.
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Nausheen
 
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 28 June 2013 at 10:05pm
"Handsome, educated, and most importantly, a Muslim. "

"He's mainly infatuated by the way you differ from the normal women he associates with... at the night club."

At 26? Is this what he really wants? But you tell yourself quietly... "If he comes back to me, I would actually take him back." Is that the good mentality to have? "

Are you asking it you should be thinking about a handsome-educated-muslim-26-who frequents nigh-clubs.

The answer should be obvios.

One should marry someone who is on the same page of religion as themselves.

If you do not find anything wrong in associating with non-muslim, non-mahrams in an inappropriate manner, nor does he, then perhaps both of you are on the same page of religion.





Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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anastasia
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Quote anastasia Replybullet Posted: 10 July 2013 at 1:58am
move on,he is not the right guy for u,plus he wants to enjoy his lyf ,doesnt want to get married,never marry someone with such a nonserious attitude,it wil ruin ur marriage,he wil not take ur responsibility and he still wants to live a bachalor lyf which wil be a problm for u.currently its hard for u to move on but most people face breakups but remember dont contact him give ur self some tym and assure ur self that he didn't deserve u,better things wil happen to u in future.gudluck
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