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|Topic: Talking with and Looking at a women for marriage|
Joined: 16 July 2011
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| Topic: Talking with and Looking at a women for marriage
Posted: 04 April 2013 at 10:28pm
Talking with and Looking at a women for marriage
If a man wants to propose marriage to a woman, it is permissible for him to speak with her and look at her without being alone.
Islam commands us to lower our gaze and forbids looking at non-mahram women. This is in order to purify people’s souls and protect their honor. There are, however, certain exceptions in which it is permissible to look at a non-mahram woman for reasons of necessity, one of which is in the case of proposing marriage, because it is the basis on which a very important decision affecting a person’s life will be taken.
If a man wants to propose marriage to a woman, it is permissible for him to speak with her and look at her without being alone. It should be done from a distance and in the presence of her father, brother or mother etc. But if he does not want to propose marriage to her, then he has no right to do that. So long as he wants to marry her.
Ibn Qudaamah said:
When a man came to the Prophet Muhammed (pbuh) to ask his opinion, he said:
It was narrated from al-Mugheerah ibn Shubah (R.A) that he proposed marriage to a woman, and the Prophet (pbuh) said:
From Jaabir ibn Abd-Allaah(R.A):
Narrated by Abu Hurayrah (R.A):
Narrated by al-Mugheerah ibn Shu’bah (R.A):
From Sahl ibn Sa’d (R.A):
Some sayings of the scholars:
Al-Shaafa’i (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Imaam al-Nawawi said in Rawdat al-Taalibeen wa ‘Umdat al-Mufteen (7, 19-20):
Abu Haneefah permitted looking at the feet as well as the face and hands. (Bidaayah al-Mujtahid wa Nihayyat al-Muqtasid, 3/10)
Among the reports from the madhhab of Imaam Maalik:
A number of reports were narrated from Imaam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him), one of which says that he may look at the face and forearms.
From the above, it is clear that the majority of scholars say that a man is allowed to look at his fiancee face and hands, because the face indicates beauty or ugliness, and the hands indicate the slimness or plumpness (literally, ‘fertility’) of the body.
There is no dispute among the scholars that the man is permitted to look at the face and hands and talk from a distance and in the presence of her father, brother or mother etc.
Allah knows the best.
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