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Groups Women (Sisters)
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Groups Women (Sisters)
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Jenni
 
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Quote Jenni Replybullet Posted: 29 September 2005 at 7:56am
Firewall, that is all nice and good if you are treated nicely by your in laws. Many girls now do not want to live with inlaws when they get married now because of all the bad stories and problems that can arise and what about just plain old privacy. My mother in law has lived with me 3 times for about 6 months. And we had no problems. My husband told her in the beggining that mom, you can't boss her around and tell her to do stuff or offer her advice like you do me. He also told her that I am very smart and when our kids were born that I would want to do things my own way(like exclusively breastfeeding, when her generation thought babies allways needed a bottle too, and delaying solids to 6 months when she though it should be 3months)So when she had any opinion she respected me, stated it nicely and I would kindly tell her no, I will not do it that way because this way is better for me and the baby. My hsuband allways backed me up, because after all it is my and his baby and we should make the decisions. Plainly stated there was no room for disrespect between us and we loved and respected each other. I expected her to not go in our bedroom and to give us our privacy in the eveing(so we could watch tv and talk and hold hands) and I made sure she had privacy with her own bedroom and bathroom. So I know there are good in laws because I have one, however I know many women do not, and it is not said in the Quran anywhere that you should live with your in-laws and tolerate abuse from them. Some expended families work, but being married to a southasian I have heard way, way to many horrer stories from the women, who basically feel like mistreated children living with thier inlaws. So Sad for them and shame on thier husbands and thier families.
You cant be a good muslim if you are not decent and have a cold heart. Be a decent and kind person and care for women and children and the elderly.
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