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Family Matter
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Family Matter
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Shifa-muslimah
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Quote Shifa-muslimah Replybullet Posted: 20 February 2012 at 1:21am
Sr ZaraMarie,

Being confused is not going to get you anywhere, trust me. You have to be strong my dear sister ... get up and think hard ... act now or regret all you life. Its not a time to be confused but a time to act and react .

I personally don;t believe in Facebook stuff and neither should you my dear sister. First of all you need to find out if you really are actually MARRIED or not ?? Islamically...... then according to what your situation is then you can take the next step. Ofcourse decision is in your hands.  Try to find the truth from his relatives and close friends if you he is really Gay or now. May be its just another trick to get you off the shoulder without doing anything..he wants to get rid of you anyway right ???
Also I don;t know if you know the dua of Isthekara... you can find that on the internet.. it is a dua of seeking guidance when a slave of Allah is very confused and does not know where to turn too .. it is probably the best time to do is now these days.. you pray 2 rakat nafl salah intention of Isthekara . And ask Allah to guide you if he is good for you and if you should stay with him.. one way or another inshAllah you will be guided ...Allah will open doors for you and you will find out .
While Praying do your research and get the facts ..it is very important ..please do not rely on silly places like Facebook. Also contact your local imam to get clarification on your marriage.
Please don;t think and act soon... May Allah be with you ameen
wa'salam
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Nausheen
 
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 21 February 2012 at 9:27pm
What do you exactly mean by your husband told you that you were married?
 
Didn't anyone ask for your permission before declaring you husband and wife?
You can't just step out of a mosque and start being called someone's wife without already knowing  you are being wedded to him.
Please explain that part of your post.
 
Another point - no person is punished for other's sins, so definitely you are not at fault, but his is.
 
You should not let go of the matter without reporting it to proper authorities. He must be discouraged for what he had done, by penalities and punishments - this is neccessary for the sake of other sisters he might fool, or for other men who might dare do the same with someone else. Irregularities in society should not be left for Allah alone to deal with - because Allah has made us His vicegerant on this planet.
 
Wish you all the best
 


Edited by Nausheen - 21 February 2012 at 9:28pm
Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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zaramarie
 
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Quote zaramarie Replybullet Posted: 22 February 2012 at 3:38am
no he did not ask permission he told me we were going to mosgue for pray because i truned to islam,i did not understand because every thing was done and said in pushto,it was only after when i ask he told me we just done nikah.
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Nausheen
 
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 22 February 2012 at 7:30pm
that was fraudulent my dear!
 
Even if they were doing everything in pushto, there should have been a translator for you who should have asked your permission for the formalities of the nikah.
 
You should be collecting evidences, see a lawyer, see an imaam and challenge not just this person who called himself your husband but also the mosque and the imaams who allowed such activities in their presence.
 
All of this could be a very emotionally draining process. Do you have a support system - friends, family acquantences? Even if your support system is a list of screen names you communicate thru a computer screen - is better than going through this alone.
It is clear he did this to get his visa - you were used and abused. Report this to appropriate authorities.
 
Zaramarie, may Allah make it easy for you.
Im really sorry that someone who calls himself muslim has been trecherous and scheming.  May your strength and your adherence to the faith deliver you safe through these trouble times.
 
My prayers are with you!
 
Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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