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Family Matter
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Family Matter
Message Icon Topic: My parents, may Allah be pleased on them Post Reply Post New Topic
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Full of Hopes
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Quote Full of Hopes Replybullet Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:26am

 Asslamu Alaikum

 Nice to see you sister Hayfa, really may Allah bless you for your reply. I know the culture plays a big role, but I know many here from my culture whose parents have nothing to do with their lives. It is amazing but TRUE. I know who live alone while they have families.
 WE just ask Allah to help us please Him.


Edited by Full of Hopes - 03 December 2009 at 8:27am
And whoever seeks a religion other than Islâm, it will never be accepted of him, and in the Hereafter he will be one of the losers(3:85)
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Quote seekshidayath Replybullet Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:43am
As Salamu Alaikum

Sis FOH, you have been advised very well by members and you too are wise enough to handle situations very well. I would like to just remind you that this area is very sensitive in our lives. We need to be very careful. I understand it gets tough sometimes, but don't forget its one of the toughest trials, wherein we are not to even sigh at them. So "patience, patience and only patience" will be the solution for betterment in dunya as well as aakhirah.

You must have heard this hadith many times that," Obedience is only with regard to what is good and proper

When their commands contradict shariah, then we may politely act against it, otherwise just be with patience. They don't want you to have french fries, don't have it. They don't want you to meet certain freinds, even though they are good, okay don't meet them. Yes, its tough but anything for the sake of obeying commands of Allah swt. What i do is when they are in good mood, i speak of that freind they want me to stay connected. I talk of their good character, or convey their salam to my parents, This way insha Allah, one say they shall themselves, ask of that friend and shall have no problem if we stay connected to them.
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “All the descendants of Adam are sinners, and the best of sinners are those who repent."
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Quote Full of Hopes Replybullet Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:07am
Originally posted by seekshidayath

As Salamu Alaikum

Sis FOH, you have been advised very well by members and you too are wise enough to handle situations very well. I would like to just remind you that this area is very sensitive in our lives. We need to be very careful. I understand it gets tough sometimes, but don't forget its one of the toughest trials, wherein we are not to even sigh at them. So "patience, patience and only patience" will be the solution for betterment in dunya as well as aakhirah.

You must have heard this hadith many times that," Obedience is only with regard to what is good and proper

When their commands contradict shariah, then we may politely act against it, otherwise just be with patience. They don't want you to have french fries, don't have it. They don't want you to meet certain freinds, even though they are good, okay don't meet them. Yes, its tough but anything for the sake of obeying commands of Allah swt. What i do is when they are in good mood, i speak of that freind they want me to stay connected. I talk of their good character, or convey their salam to my parents, This way insha Allah, one say they shall themselves, ask of that friend and shall have no problem if we stay connected to them.


 May Allah bless you for every word you typed here, sister Seekshidayath. We are human beings and still need to remind each other of what please Allah. That is right. The more we suffer is the more we are rewarded.
 But, sometimes, you feel you are weak and the shatian can tick you easily.
 I posted this when I was upset and shitan made me fee like I am a prisoner. But then Allah helped and then with those advises, I became stronger and tried to accept it and treat them well. Maybe, I should sneak with the friends I know are good but they do not like. But I am brought up not to hide anything from them.. but just until the time to make them sure my friends are not bad. We have to be patient.Big%20smile
  And we need support from Allah to be patient: "Our Lord! pour out on us patience and constancy, and take our souls unto thee as Muslims (who bow to thy will)!" 7.126 



Edited by Full of Hopes - 03 December 2009 at 9:09am
And whoever seeks a religion other than Islâm, it will never be accepted of him, and in the Hereafter he will be one of the losers(3:85)
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Quote fais Replybullet Posted: 08 December 2009 at 6:05am
Salam sister FOH,
 
This is the ageold story of every youth,parents dont agree and you wanna do the same thing what they are against.this is called generation gap,but sister we should never forget we are muslims we judge it from the islamic point of view,which is islamic accept it and which is not islamic try to explain them if not leave them and dont argue,
 
example if they dont want you to eat french fries this is correct cause it is junk food which effects your health this is their islamic right to stop you.
 
There are many reasons parents are strict and choosy about their daughters,some parents dont want their daughters to be fat or out of fasion so that they cab get good good marraige proposals from the society,some thinks that if they continue any bad habit it will effect their married life and like men,woman cannot stay alone and be safe so what will happen to their daughter after them,some parents want her to choose good friends so that her name is not spoilt in the society,
 
boys are fortunite in this case they dont have so many restrictions but sister think in a broader sence,if you accept those boundries set by allah you will be more rewarded then boys,allah is the most just.
 
this post is not complete i will comment more later
 
regards
 
 
 
 


Edited by fais - 08 December 2009 at 6:39am
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Quote Full of Hopes Replybullet Posted: 08 December 2009 at 8:22am
Originally posted by fais

Salam sister FOH,
 
This is the ageold story of every youth,parents dont agree and you wanna do the same thing what they are against.this is called generation gap,but sister we should never forget we are muslims we judge it from the islamic point of view,which is islamic accept it and which is not islamic try to explain them if not leave them and dont argue,
 
example if they dont want you to eat french fries this is correct cause it is junk food which effects your health this is their islamic right to stop you.
 
There are many reasons parents are strict and choosy about their daughters,some parents dont want their daughters to be fat or out of fasion so that they cab get good good marraige proposals from the society,some thinks that if they continue any bad habit it will effect their married life and like men,woman cannot stay alone and be safe so what will happen to their daughter after them,some parents want her to choose good friends so that her name is not spoilt in the society,
 
boys are fortunite in this case they dont have so many restrictions but sister think in a broader sence,if you accept those boundries set by allah you will be more rewarded then boys,allah is the most just.
 
this post is not complete i will comment more later
 
regards
 
 Thank you so much brother Fais, the problem is solved and I kept the post just for others to get the benefit if they face a similar confusion, but for me Alhamdulaillah, I am fine. I do not have any problem now.Smile
 
 
And whoever seeks a religion other than Islâm, it will never be accepted of him, and in the Hereafter he will be one of the losers(3:85)
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Quote fais Replybullet Posted: 08 December 2009 at 8:51pm
salam,
 
good the problem is solved,alhumdulillah,it reminded me how i use to defy my father when he use to say no for something.
you know sister these restrictions sometimes are so memorable,when your parents are not arround you really miss it.
i give you one example in my life:
one day i was in the club playing snooker and there was salah time but as the game was not over i missed the jamaat,my father came after salah and found i dint go for prayers,in front of more than ten people he shouted and insulted me and asked the marker not to let me play any more next time.
next time when i went the other members started looking me with respect and gave to play before them,it was such good feeling.so i take these as rehma from allah.
 
hope this will help other members to remeber their parents and cerish the good times spent with them.
 
regards


Edited by fais - 08 December 2009 at 8:58pm
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