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Family Matter
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Family Matter
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gajab62
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Quote gajab62 Replybullet Topic: divorce
    Posted: 12 July 2009 at 8:10am
hi all

i am seriously in need of some help!! i am married to a muslim man have been for 6 years now, we have had our ups and down like any couple, but on tuesday 7th july 09 we had a big fight and he has left the marital home.

he has informed me he want a divorce but i am not prepared to let our 6 years go just like that.

i need to know how i can handle this we were married in Jordan not in the uk.

i want a reconcilliation but he wont even answer his phone or text messages, please please help !
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Hayfa
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Quote Hayfa Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 5:26am


Welcome to the Forum..  am sorry you are going through these struggles.

1. Give it a little time
2. Are you able to talk to any friends or family of his to let them know your intentions?

At some point he will need to talk to you. I do say the worst is to go 'chasing' him. Let him know you want to continue and give hm a bit of space.

Have patience...
When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
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gajab62
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Quote gajab62 Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 11:56am
ty i really appreciate your post , i am beside my self i have spoken to one of his best friends out in jordan and i ahve spokent o one of his cousins and i managed to get hold of an immam at the hospital that i work at , he spoke to my husband for 1/2 hr and when he called me back he said ur husband has made up his mind , i will never give up hope even if he divorces me ..nothing is too big for God to deal with. althought mu husband says thats its Gods will for us to split up , i dont believe this at all!!
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sophykhan
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Quote sophykhan Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 7:07pm
??????assaam allykum is there a reason he left .if you need help send bac .like hayfa said  give it some time dont worry
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ikhwan
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Quote ikhwan Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 11:31pm
Asalamualikum, i would suggest sister that u find out the main reason for the rift and talk to family and friends, in islam divorce is not encouraged and is disliked by Allah. as said above give it some time, if the rift is solved he will inshAllah come to u, have faith in God Almighty Allah and pray to Him.
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gajab62
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Quote gajab62 Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 11:35pm
i have had a long e.mail from him, saying that he dosnt look at me as a wife anymore, but he wants to be friends! i guess there are many reasons , not all are clear to me , he says that he has an emptyness ..he misses his family, but now after 6 years he says he wants children , he knew 3 years b 4 we got married that there may be a chance that we wont wont be able to have any but he still wantred to marry me! he kept telling that its Gods willing if we have children and Gods willing if we dont , what ever God decides he will accept. i fear that when he went home it was the attacment to his niece that has made him feel like this. i believ he is very depressed but he shut the doors on me and would not talk, i thought it was just the stress of his study , but it seems far deeper than that! i just love him with all my heart and miss him like crazy. i have lost 5 kilo in a week, and i dont have it to lose! i feel i just want to die, he was my life.
i appreciate all your support thanks u so much ! its good to have people who care :)
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Akhe Abdullah
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Quote Akhe Abdullah Replybullet Posted: 14 July 2009 at 5:38am
Propet Muhammed(SAW) says"The most hated of all permissible things in the sight of Allah is divorce."Abu Dawud no.2178 and Ibn Majah no.2018.

Edited by Akhe Abdullah - 14 July 2009 at 5:42am
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martha
 
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Quote martha Replybullet Posted: 14 July 2009 at 5:53am
Salaams sister,
This is very sad, but don't give up hope. Men sometimes lose sight of what marriage is all about. Try to get as much support from the sisters around you to help you through this and come to IC as often as you feel you are able.
We are with you:)
some of us are a lot like cement:- all mixed up and permanently set
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