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Groups – Men (Brothers)
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : Culture & Community : Groups – Men (Brothers)
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abuayisha
 
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Quote abuayisha Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 2:04pm
The Prophet (saw) said: “A man is on the deen of his friend, watch out who your friends are.” Tirmidhi 2378, Abu Dawood 4833
 
Examine her family and friends, as this may give a good indication of values and belief.  Keeping in mind that most men desire an attractive wife, emphasis should be placed on her religious practice and not only family status, beauty and wealth.  You will never like everything about your wife, but look to the good aspects in her and overlook those faults which you dislike.  Generally people lie for fear of reprisal, so be kind and gentle; hopefully she then will not have to worry about her being deceitful.  I do not necessary see aggressiveness as a poor quality as long as harshness does not accompany this attribute. 
 
Like Pati mentioned indeed the opposite can be said of men, and frankly I'm surprise to hear of these complaints coming from a man about women.  It is most often, sadly,  the reverse.
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Akhe Abdullah
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Quote Akhe Abdullah Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 4:34pm
Originally posted by Ali77

How are you I want to ask you about how I can choose
my wife?.
As Salamu Alaikum,Ali.Prophet Muhammed(SAW)says that you can marry for wealth and or beauty.If a women trully fears Allah she is right for you.If she is on top of her deen she is right for you.I have heard that the women will at times choose you,they are the ones who mature faster and sometimes have limited time to pro-create according to there biological clock(Allah Knows Best)in the end.May Allah Bless you.
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Akhe Abdullah
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Quote Akhe Abdullah Replybullet Posted: 13 July 2009 at 5:02pm
Originally posted by Akhe Abdullah

Originally posted by Ali77

How are you I want to ask you about how I can choose
my wife?.
As Salamu Alaikum,Ali.Prophet Muhammed(SAW)says that you can marry for wealth and or beauty.If a women trully fears Allah she is right for you.If she is a pious women she is right for you.I have heard that the women will at times choose you,they are the ones who mature faster and sometimes have limited time to pro-create according to there biological clock.I have heard that some sisters inquire that they wish to get married threw an Imam and he introduces her to a good brother.(Allah Knows Best)in the end.May Allah Bless you.
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Duane
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Quote Duane Replybullet Posted: 14 July 2009 at 10:40am
As Salamu Alaikum,Ali.

I have to agree with the majority of advice you are getting from the brothers.  I would like to add that I have married in the past for beauty.  This was before I came to Islam.  None of these marriages worked out.  Beauty is a transient thing and is one of the ways we are misguided in this world. 

Duane
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Akhe Abdullah
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Quote Akhe Abdullah Replybullet Posted: 14 July 2009 at 11:23am
Originally posted by Duane

As Salamu Alaikum,Ali.I have to agree with the majority of advice you are getting from the brothers.  I would like to add that I have married in the past for beauty.  This was before I came to Islam.  None of these marriages worked out.  Beauty is a transient thing and is one of the ways we are misguided in this world.  Duane
Wa Alaikum As Salam Duane.The Beauty you are talking about is outer,say you are inquiring on marring a sister who dawns a full niqab, and she is pious and wont show you her face,how would one still think that she is beautiful,you get it.
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Chrysalis
 
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Quote Chrysalis Replybullet Posted: 15 July 2009 at 1:58am
I think even Niqabi sisters can remove the face veil - so that both prospective partners can look at each other. Both have a right to know what the other looks like. Unless it is a very pious brother who does not mind. Which I believe are 1% of today's muslim ummah. . .   Looking at our spouse before marriage is sunnah - sunnah is an 'encouraged act', following sunnah is sawab. One should not try to exceed beyond sunnah in thier actions (Bukhari hadith narrated by Aisha (r.a) about the 3 men who went beyond sunnah)
"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
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JihadX
 
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Quote JihadX Replybullet Posted: 15 July 2009 at 12:01pm
Aha nice conversation going on here... I think the most admirable woman would be the muslimah wearing niqab. To marry such would be an honor. Allah knows best....
I think it symbolizes her personality as religious and modest. To me, this is more important than looks of her face.
“The knife that slaughtered the guards at Bagram and set us free is now on its way to other places,”
_ The Mujahid, The Eminent, Sheikh Abu Yahya Al Libi
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abuayisha
 
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Quote abuayisha Replybullet Posted: 15 July 2009 at 12:41pm
"I think it symbolizes her personality as religious and modest."
 
Or could simply be form over substance.  Look closer at actions to make a more accurate determination.
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