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Humour
 IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum : General : Humour
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Chrysalis
 
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Quote Chrysalis Replybullet Topic: Men . . .
    Posted: 29 October 2008 at 6:37am
We've all had our share of dumb-blonde-jokes . . .  time for some new ones: LOL You may have heard some before, but too good to leave out Wink
 

Why do men prefer blondes?
Men always like intellectual company.  Smile

Why do men like love at first sight?
It saves them a lot of time.

Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Why are blonde jokes so short?
So men can remember them. 


What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted. Big%20smile

What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist. 

How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to act macho and shake the stove. 


How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable". 

Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it. 

What is the thinnest book in the world?
"What men know about women." 

What's the difference between men and government bonds?
Bonds mature. Tongue

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
Who knows? - did it ever happen?? 

How are men and parking spots alike?
The good ones are always taken...

What is the difference between a man and E.T.?
E.T. phoned home. LOL

Why are men like laxatives?
They can irritate the sh*t out of you.

Why is it good that there are women astronauts?
So that when the crew gets lost in space, at least the women will ask for directions 

Why do men like blonde jokes so much?
Because they can understand them 

Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?
When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there

Why are men like commercials?
You can't believe a word they say

Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
Tongue

LOL

 
"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
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Saladin
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Quote Saladin Replybullet Posted: 30 October 2008 at 6:32am
 Stern%20Smile ............ Cry

Edited by Saladin - 30 October 2008 at 6:33am
'Trust everyone but not the devil in them'
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abuayisha
 
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Quote abuayisha Replybullet Posted: 30 October 2008 at 6:57am

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

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Chrysalis
 
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Quote Chrysalis Replybullet Posted: 31 October 2008 at 11:04am
Cheer up Saladin . . . :p it was meant to make you laugh.... not cry! Tongue
"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
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Imani
 
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Quote Imani Replybullet Posted: 01 November 2008 at 2:13am
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
 
What is the thinnest book in the world?
"What men know about women." 
 
 
salam. this joke is realy funnyClap
   So do you mean to say that men are like dogs?LOL
Oh and one more thing, the thinnest book in the world can not be found by all men but rather those with magnifying  eyes.Wink
 lol!! 
       just kiddingBig%20smile
                                                  peace chrysalis
 


Edited by Imani - 01 November 2008 at 2:15am
"But those who believe and do righteous deeds are the best of all creatures."(surah98:7)
peace for all peace for the nation. To Allah indeed we are to return. SALAM
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abuayisha
 
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Quote abuayisha Replybullet Posted: 02 November 2008 at 1:21pm

How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart? When she starts her sentence with , "A man once told me... "

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Imani
 
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Quote Imani Replybullet Posted: 02 November 2008 at 2:10pm
that's a lie abuayisha.
 lol!
  By the way, what do you mean by the word 'smart'
 pls. tell me, are you supporting the men or the women?
 infact! every word from a woman is 'smart'. even if she smiles, it is a smart action.
"But those who believe and do righteous deeds are the best of all creatures."(surah98:7)
peace for all peace for the nation. To Allah indeed we are to return. SALAM
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Chrysalis
 
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Quote Chrysalis Replybullet Posted: 03 November 2008 at 4:55am

Smile

"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
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