IslamiCity Forum - Islamic Discussion Forum: How to be a Successful Muslim Wife

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minuteman

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Posted: 29 February 2008 at 11:19pm

Thanks to Truth_light and Aminah for their good ideas. Those are the right guidelines for a successful marriage.

I would only like to say something for a help to the husbands. It is mentioned ( In hadith??) that the woman was born from the rib of Adam. Even though that may be a christian idea, I am not sure and it may be in the hadith too. Please do not believe it literally.

It is said that the prophet told the men not to straighten the rib, i.e. not to press the wife beyond its limit otherwise it will break.

The actual meaning is that every time a man will do or say something, the lady will also have a say in that matter. That say may not be the ideal or good thing. But she will say something and suggest something. Give some regard to what she says and all will live peacefully in the house.

If any one is bad some one must suffer

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Aminah07

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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 4:52am

JazakAllahuKhair br Minuteman

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martha

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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 5:14am

Some really nice comments from the sisters. Shame that not all sisters are given the entitlement to stay at home if they wish, to pamper the husband as she would like, and to have the freedom to live such an easy life.

I'm sure many 'less fortunate sisters' would love their husbands to take full charge of the bills, that all worries and concerns lay with 'their man' , to maybe also have a 'servant' in the home, as many asians seem to have back home.Yes I think I could handle a similar life of ease very nicely. How wonderful to relax and concentrate all day getting the outerappearance ready in time for him to come home, and sit at home all day chatting and drinking tea.

some of us are a lot like cement:- all mixed up and permanently set

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minuteman

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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 5:40am

That is also a good point of view from Martha, about those eastern do nothing type of wives. There was no lesson for them to take part in any earning affair. That is because Islam has put all the burden on the husband, so to say. But I hope it is not the final word. The mother of the faithful (Hazrat Khudaijah r.a.) was a practical business woman trading to distance countries.

I hope not all husbands will bind their ladies to remain at home all the time. In the Indian sub-continent, the ladies are quite hard workers, working in the fields and doing their share of work in many ways. Islam has put the burden of earning on the man. But it is possible that man cannot meet the demands of the house alone. So what to do?

If the lady will earn (working in office or school etc) then she will pass the orders in the house too. The ladies are not allowed to work in the offices or to show their faces anywhere. It is a complicated affair. Truth-light should please arrange some other program of good guidance for married ladies so as to keep in view the overall practical problems faced by the muslim families.

If any one is bad some one must suffer

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Truth_light24

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Joined: 13 January 2008
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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 6:12pm

Thank you so much brother and sisters for the enlightenment.

And I hope my soon-to-be-husband will allow me to continuously work after I got married. Am used to being a working woman and I think Its a waste not to practice the skill you painstakingly acquired for years in college.

And those who annoy believing men and women undeservedly, bear (on themselves) a calumny and a glaring sin. Quran33:59

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seekshidayath
Female Islam
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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 6:26pm

And truthlight, you said a wife shud sing for her husband

It may make him run, if she is a bad singer

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) commanded us to recite a lot of Tasbeeh ("Subhan-Allaah"),Tahmeed ("Al-hamdu Lillaah")& Takbeer ("Allaahu akbar") during these 10 days .

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Truth_light24

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Posted: 01 March 2008 at 6:52pm

Well Seekshidayath, in every rules there is an exception...if we think that our voice can be mistaken for a donkey, then better opted not to sing and lessen the talking as well.....

Even the usage of khol, if the eye is too large, like frog-eye, i think better choose something that would make it look "normal" otherwise our betterhalf will have restless nights

Edited by Truth_light24

And those who annoy believing men and women undeservedly, bear (on themselves) a calumny and a glaring sin. Quran33:59

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imp87

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Joined: 15 July 2007
Location: United Kingdom
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Posts: 164

Posted: 03 March 2008 at 3:12am

Brothers if you think you can find a wife like the one mentioned in the post..........

In your dreams

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lovesakeenah
Female Islam
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Joined: 13 June 2007
Location: South Africa
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Posts: 439

Posted: 21 May 2008 at 1:38am

uuh uuh!Don't be a pessimist imp87.It is feasible.There're troubles in the world&human still remain the most complex of all God' creation.It still doesn't suffice to say there're no good women out there.

Jazakallahu khayran sis.Truth_Light for the informative&enlightening post.And sis.Aminah for sharing your successful marriage with us.Snd seekshidayath,you're very funny with the thought of not being able to sing.Meanwhile,you may have some nice steps if you can't do the singing.I've heard that works too (haven't practised it though).

I think I've got some more tips on marriage.I'd try to dig up my archives insha Allahu&post it here as well.It's for everyone-brothers and sisters masha Allahu...

yeah,I know,the response's a bit late..

"I have conviction that Allah has power over everything.Verily!Allah's knowledge includes and encompasses everything".

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Shasta'sAunt
Female Islam
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Joined: 29 March 2008
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Posts: 1931

Posted: 21 May 2008 at 6:08am

Assalamu Alaikum:

I think the best way to be a good Muslim wife is to marry a good Muslim man...

I do have a comment about the fighting part. I know a Sister who allowed her husband to write into their marriage contract that she could never raise her voice to him or fight back. No matter how much he yells or provokes her, which he does.

Frankly, as someone who has been married for many years, if I couldn't fight back with my husband and have a good yell once in a while, I'd have to smother him with a pillow in his sleep.

It is not healthy to keep everything bottled up all of the time. Women are human also and have a need to let off steam and be angry just the same as men.

Don't let that pillow start looking good to you.....

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
Eleanor Roosevelt

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