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Message Icon Topic: The importance of a chaste wife Post Reply Post New Topic
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layalee
 
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Quote layalee Replybullet Topic: The importance of a chaste wife
    Posted: 12 January 2008 at 10:39pm

As salaamu Alakum

I had a question in my head that I was wondering. At first I said to myself 'no I will be too 'nosy' if I ask the brothers of the IC forum this question' Or perhaps it will lead to too much controversy...but I really was too curious for a response to leave it to myself. But I just ask that who ever reads or respond to this post please respect each other opinions. If my question is too 'personal' then I apologize in advance and meant no harm

When choosing a wife or when you choose one. How important to you that she is a virgin? If she fully repented for fornicating ( well if you believe she is sincere about it, that is) would that be enough to marry her? or does her past actions simply do not meet what you want in a wife?

What if she had children? Would you persue a unmarried sister that already has children? or is that a no-no!

would your parents look down on your actions if you married a woman that was not a virgin or had children?

Is the importance of marrying a chaste wife more important in Islamic countries then how it may be in West ( I am American)?

In Islamic countries, do woman get arrested or deep trouble if there husbands find out that they were not virgins?

( please note- Yes I am aware that fornication/ adultry is a major sin performed by MAN or WOMAN)

If anyone reply thanks for sharing!

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Salih88
 
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Quote Salih88 Replybullet Posted: 14 January 2008 at 10:09pm
Wa alaikum masalam,

When I choose a wife it would not matter if she was a virgin or not. I had not even thought about that until I saw this post. The only way you could know would be if you asked, I would be to shy or emberessed to ask, or if someone else told me. If she had commited fornication in jahiliya and become muslim than Allah has forgiven her and it is not a factor. If she did it and she was raised a muslim than maybe she has repented and Allah is hiding her sins. If someone told me they heard about her commiting zina then I would have to ask. If she seemed remoresful and others attested to her character than it is okay.

As for children. I personally wouldn't want to marry someone who has kids because I am a student and it would be hard for me to support her and kids. If Allah blessed me with the ability and she was righteous than its no problem.

And as for my parents. They have told me they can stop me from marrying anyone, only advise me. So I would take heed to what they say because they know better than me.

Your other questions I cannot answer because I am an American also.

Salam
"Be patient over what they say and remember Our servant, Dawud, the possessor of strenght; indeed, he was one who repeatedly turned back[to Allah]" Surah Sad- Ayat 17
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minuteman
 
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Quote minuteman Replybullet Posted: 14 February 2008 at 7:54am

 Salih88 has given a good reply. Chastity is very important. But nowadays, the muslims do not know many things and they do get invovled into bad habits and cheating. They fall short of the real Islamic standards.

 It is best not to discuss the past life of a lady. Even though it matters much but it better be left alone. Unless there has been a bad relation that may continue even after marriage. That would be hell.

 But it could happen even after the marriage. The question of being chaste can arise after the marriage too.  a chaste man or woman may marry but later in married life they may go on the wrong path. We have seen so many examples of that too.

 If we leave this subject and try to discuss the Arabic word Nikah, it could be quite an interesting subject too.

 There is a lot about Nikah in the Quran. The bad ladies are for the bad men. Please give the meaning (Definition) of the word nikah as it appears in the Quran. Thanks.

If any one is bad some one must suffer
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minuteman
 
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Quote minuteman Replybullet Posted: 20 February 2008 at 7:52am

 

 It appears that no friend is interested in the meaning of the word Nikah as it appears in the Quran. So we may forget about it. Thanks. No comments.

If any one is bad some one must suffer
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poga
 
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Quote poga Replybullet Posted: 20 February 2008 at 1:01pm

whore can become chaste by tawbah

a woman who was married but now divorced or widow she is still chaste but may not be virgin

anyone married or unmarried who commits zina is not chaste

but bay the bay do you know any divorced or widow would take me

or any whore who is ready for repent by getting punishment in me as husband

awal
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