ZamanH,

You say that men have less control over their appitites.........and that if banned it will continue to exist in other ways..........who would you be cheating or comminting this act with? Does it not stand to reason to you that if you feel that way that there are women that feel that way?  Men always say what you say and some go out and have many many many women........the key word  there is women....

Am I making sense?? If women did not crave it to some extent you would have NO ONE to be with......

Lameese

EQUALITY OF MEN AND WOMEN

" Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a new life, a life that is good and pure, and We will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions (16:19)"

CONTROL YOURSELF!

the Commander of the Faithful Ali (Pbuh) said:

God the Glorious and the Almighty has given angels intellect with no lust; the animals have lust without intellect; and man has both intellect and lust. Whoever can govern his lust with his intellect is superior to the angels, and whoever loses control of his intellect or his lust is inferior to the animals. [Bihar al-Anwar, v.57, p.299]

JUSTICE IS THE KEY!

" marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course." (Nisa 4:3)

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Men and women have different roles and responsibilities within the context of marriage, however, this does not mean that one person (or one role) is superior to the other.

As a married man, many times I have difficulty fulfilling my Islamic duties toward my ONE WIFE (i.e., being just, being kind and gentle with her in all situations, providing for her and my children financially, etc.) Even if a man has been blessed with wealth, this does not mean that he can be just with his time (i.e., if you have more than one wife, you must be equitable in ALL MATTERS, including the time you spend with them, etc.).

If a man focuses on the rights that his wife and children have on him, vs. what HE WANTS from them, the idea of plural marriage becomes less attractive. If a man is simply wanting to marry a second, third or fourth wife for lustful reasons, then this is prohibited in Islam and he will damage himself and his family. I have seen examples of successul plural marriages (when the man has the means, and both the huband and wife are mumineen (belivers)), however, this is the rare exception. In general, I would stay one wife is preferable (and Islam supports this) for a man who wants to protect himself in this world (Dunya) and the next (Ahira).

Salam